


Torn Flower

by Hajinnie



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe - Historical, Alternate Universe - Prostitution, Brothels, Class Differences, Debt, Japanese Culture, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Period-Typical Sexism, Promises, Prostitution, Sexual Inexperience
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-29
Updated: 2018-02-06
Packaged: 2019-03-11 00:52:30
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 21,742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13513323
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hajinnie/pseuds/Hajinnie
Summary: Running a renowned oiran [courtesan] house in the Yoshiwara red-light district isn’t that hard for Kyungsoo, even as a male in a strictly woman-dominated profession.Then comes Chanyeol, an old friend of Kyungsoo’s deceased mother who comes to look for her but instead finds a growing infatuation towards Kyungsoo.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> *Prostitution and buying sexual favors is a theme and setting for this fic if you're uncomfortable with that. There are also the effects and implications of sexism and social class differences recurring in the story.
> 
> *This fic is set in the 1920s in the early Showa period, although I decided to keep the Korean names for both Chanyeol and Kyungsoo. May be historically inaccurate as this is just a work of fiction.
> 
> *Chanyeol is much older than Kyungsoo by eleven years here.
> 
> *The title is taken from the name of the oiran house partly meaning "flower".
> 
> \--
> 
> Got any questions or just need to contact me? : curiouscat.me/hajinnie  
> Also on Twitter @hajinnie

 

Although the day for everyone in Yoshiwara starts in the late afternoon, Kyungsoo has long started his day since morning because there is a lot to do especially as the only male owner of the Hanakai oiran house in all of Yoshiwara.

In the oiran house where everyone is referred to as family members, Kyungsoo is the Father of the house in a position which usually would be a Mother.

 

One might find Kyungsoo’s position to be rather odd because first and foremost, he is male in a strictly matriarchal industry where males are only viewed at as outsiders.

But yet, Kyungsoo is at the top of the game and well known throughout Yoshiwara for his renowned oiran house, pushing the Hanakai house to be one of the prestigious oiran houses in all of Yoshiwara, where an average salaryman would have to fork out a large sum to just dine and be entertained with one of Kyungsoo’s oirans.

To spend a night with one of these oirans, one would have to look into almost a month’s salary and Kyungsoo’s top oiran was known to charge an entire annual salary for a single night.

 

 

But of course, the prestige didn’t come without a price and sacrifice.

Kyungsoo is tirelessly on his feet the entire day, never slacking off as he moves to and fro doing numerous tasks and duties around the oiran house to prepare for the day.

Kyungsoo knows that Yoshiwara is a cutthroat business competition. With tens more oiran houses in Yoshiwara, competition is tough and evil especially when the participants are people who have been molded by the hard life and are also at the top of their game.

 

As a male, Kyungsoo has no place in this world so he knows he has to try twice as hard as everyone else.

Kyungsoo doesn’t rest or even gives himself time to breathe because he does not believe in giving his competitors the time to rise while he is out doing nothing.

 

 

 

In the morning, Kyungsoo has to send the young oiran in training to various classes where they learn the art of traditional tea ceremonies, flower arranging and even calligraphy.

Oirans are more than just prostitutes who give out sexual favors. They are also first and foremost entertainers who train for years in respective disciplines as their trade skill.

After dropping the apprentices off at class, Kyungsoo runs around town and makes sure orders are made at the various stores for items the house needs. Be it normal daily supplies or even items needed for their trade.

 

In the afternoon, Kyungsoo personally trains his trainees in singing and in the classical hand-held musical instruments such as the shamisen.

Currently, Kyungsoo has four girls under him as apprentices. All the oirans and those who train to be one did not choose this lifestyle for themselves. It is tiring, grueling and at times torturous.

 

Most of the girls have been sold off by their families and some of them are the daughters of the previous oirans.

Being born to an oiran and growing up in such a world, Kyungsoo himself was trained in the arts that an oiran would. Except that he knew that he would never become one because of the gender he was born in.

As the owner of the oiran house, Kyungsoo pays and funds his trainee’s studies, food, accommodation, and living expenses until they turn twenty years old.

Then, they make their debut as an oiran in a lavish deflowering ceremony where their virginity is sold off to the highest bidder for an exorbitant price. After that, they are allowed to work and earn back money for the house until their debt is paid off.

 

 

 

Late in the afternoon when the sun has slipped nearer to the horizon, Kyungsoo goes up to the third floor of the house to meet Aunty, the retired and former second-highest ranked oiran of the Hanakai house.

Aunty is a polite middle aged-woman in her early fifties with graying hair worn in a neat bun and has long since retired as an oiran over fifteen years ago.

Kyungsoo delivers Auntie’s meal on a tray as he carefully lays out the various dishes and pours her tea from a kettle on a charcoal briquette stove in her room.

 

“You look tired today out of all days, Kyungsoo,” Aunty comments, rustling a hand through Kyungsoo’s thick black hair.

“There’s a lot to be done today and in the days to come, Aunty,” Kyungsoo smiles, stirring the soup for Aunty. “Hatsuyuki’s debut is later this week and I’m still deciding on the client to accept for her since I had to drop Mr. Ishikawa because it turns out that he was recently arrested for illegal trading. I will not accept such a client and tarnish our house.”

“I know you will do your best, Kyungsoo, but you are only human too.” Aunty mentions, sipping her tea, “You need to rest sometimes too. You work too hard. In fact, you are not even very much older than the oiran here.”

“I do this for the glory and reputation of our house. It is my duty.” Kyungsoo politely lowers his head, “So do not worry about me, Aunty. You should be concerned about your health more than me.”

Aunty smiled weakly, holding the ceramic cup in her hand. “You really do take after your mother, Kyungsoo. Sometimes when I look at you, I see her image and I miss her very much. We grew up together here like blood sisters. She left the house for me but because of my health, I had to give it to you. I feel terrible for making you do such work in a world you don’t belong in.”

Aunty places down her cup and solemnly looks away.

“Aunty”, Kyungsoo places a hand on her shoulder and smiles, “It is alright. This is better. If you hadn’t given me this house, I would have to leave when I turned twenty and I would have nowhere to go. All I had were the skills I learned here which wouldn’t be of use outside the walls of Yoshiwara. Even though I cannot be an oiran like Mother and you were, I can still do my best as the Father of the house now.”

“You really do take after your mother,” Aunty smiled and fondly recalls, “She was daring and ambitious like you. I still remember the day you were born and Grandmother threatened to remove her if she didn’t give you away because you were born male. She threatened Grandmother that the house’s reputation would drop without her because she was the top oiran in all of Yoshiwara. Grandmother died of a heart attack not long after that because of the scare and she became the new Mother. Nobody dared to challenge her after that and she got to keep you here.”

Kyungsoo too smiled, “I can only aspire to be half of the person she was. Mother was too great for me to even dream of attaining her level.”

Aunty chuckled, covering her mouth, “She did rename the house after herself. I suppose that she lives on in all of us and in you.”

“She did. This is what she loved doing and I will continue her legacy.” Kyungsoo politely adds.

 

 

 

In the evening, Kyungsoo makes sure the oirans are awake and getting ready for the night.

Although the fully fledged oirans have the apprentices as their assistants, Kyungsoo does his best to help as much as he can.

Be it helping them to fix their hairdo, tying up the sash to their kimono and even helping them with their makeup.

 

 

Early in the night, Kyungsoo sees them off as a carriage comes to pick them up to send the oiran to the respective teahouses where they will entertain the clients for the night.

As part of a ritualistic tradition, Kyungsoo throws salt over their shoulders on each of them when they leave to purify the evil spirits.

It was more tradition than anything because Kyungsoo believed that the true evil spirits are the human themselves.

 

 

Then, the house is quiet and Kyungsoo takes the opportunity to eat and bathe. When he is done, Kyungsoo fixes the room for the guests and sits by the door and waits for the oiran to return with their clients for the night.

 

That night was a quiet late spring night. The sky was clear and Kyungsoo could see the stars lighting up the sky as he sat on a bench near the doorway with the sliding doors left open.

Maybe Aunty was right all along. Kyungsoo did feel tired today more than he did of all days. Since taking over the house from Aunty over three years ago, Kyungsoo has not had a single day off since then.

Kyungsoo closed his eyes as he felt a light breeze blow through and ruffle his hair. It was cool, soothing and reminded him of open pastures and paddy fields in the village that he had been to only a few times.

 

 

The breeze was too nice and lulling. Kyungsoo almost fell asleep and dozed off until he heard a knocking sound.

Kyungsoo opened his eyes and saw a tall man in a boater hat and dressed in a brown three-piece suit, standing by the sliding door which had been left open.

The man was knocking on the door frame even if the door was already open, to begin with.

 

Still seated on the bench, Kyungsoo looked up to the man and asked, “What is your business here?”

“This is the Hanakai oiran house isn’t it?” The man joyfully announced, flashing his teeth as he grinned.

“It is. We have a signboard outside. Who may you be?” Kyungsoo replied.

“I’m Chanyeol. I’m friends with the owner, Hanakai. I would like to visit her if that’s possible.” Chanyeol gleefully added. “Just tell her Chanyeol is here and she’ll know.”

Kyungsoo’s breath hitched at the mention of his mother. Kyungsoo stood up, standing significantly shorter than Chanyeol as he braved himself to drop the hard truth. “I’m sorry to inform you but Hanakai passed away over seven years ago. I am the new owner of this house now.”

 

Chanyeol’s eyes grew wide in surprise as his mouth hung open. Chanyeol gasped and looked very startled indeed. It took him a few more minutes to finally say something, after standing there in silence under the star-lit night sky.

“I’m sorry”, Chanyeol apologized, taking off his hat. “I didn’t know about that. You see, I’ve been studying and working abroad for the past sixteen years. I’ve only returned last month and I have been busy reconnecting with my old friends. Hanakai was an old friend of mine and I have been looking forward to visiting her. If I may ask, how did she go?”

“She passed away peacefully in her sleep after being down with pneumonia for weeks. Were you perhaps a previous client of my mother’s?”

“That’s unfortunate,” Chanyeol solemnly added before realizing, “You’re her son!?” Chanyeol exclaimed, “You’re the young boy from back then? Wait-why is a man in charge of an oiran house? Have things in Yoshiwara changed since I’ve been gone?”

“I get that a lot,” Kyungsoo nonchalantly replied, shaking his head.

“You were about seven or eight when I was last here but I didn’t expect you to-“Chanyeol was at a loss for words due to the bizarre situation he found himself in.

“-be the owner of an oiran house, still living in Yoshiwara past adulthood? I get that a lot too, as a matter of fact,” Kyungsoo sighed innately.  This was nothing he wasn’t used to.

“Well then, is Aunty still around? I’d like to talk to her if that’s possible for old times’ sake,” Chanyeol requested.

 

“She’s upstairs. I’ll ask her first if she wishes to meet you. You stay here near the door. Men aren’t allowed inside the oiran house.” Kyungsoo informed.

“But you are male too?” Chanyeol arched an eyebrow, inquisitively.

“I’m different. The women here trust me and are comfortable with me here,” Kyungsoo scoffed, before turning around to head to the stairs up to the second floor.

“Why is that so? Men are only viewed as beneficiaries among the oiran. Did you get castrated?” Chanyeol joked.

“That’s none of your business,” Kyungsoo winced, leaving Chanyeol near the doorway.

 

 

Kyungsoo was sort of hoping Aunty would refuse to meet Chanyeol because Kyungsoo wanted to get rid of Chanyeol as soon as possible, especially before the oiran returned with their clients for the night.

It was of bad taste to have a man who wasn’t a paying client to be seen roaming around the house. Then again, Kyungsoo was a man himself but he was trusted to be around the women in the house because of the well-known fact that he was gay.

Kyungsoo would have rather kept that fact a secret but it did actually help him here in Yoshiwara. Women were more at ease and comfortable around Kyungsoo for being gay, as men were generally only seen as clients and for financial purposes.

Often if not, men were secretly viewed as slimy and vile people who took advantage of the oiran. But of course, that fact was kept secret and the women were made to fake their smiles and courteousness to repay their debts and keep themselves housed, clothed and fed.

 

Kyungsoo knew that he wouldn’t be accepted outside the Yoshiwara community for being who he was and like almost all the women here, Kyungsoo himself was very much a chained bird to the trade.

 

 

Aunty did, however, want to meet Chanyeol and Kyungsoo was obliged to let Chanyeol see Aunty.

Kyungsoo brought Chanyeol up to Auntie’s room and restrained himself from the anxiousness he felt to have a man enter the house without being a paying customer.

 

Kyungsoo prepared tea for Chanyeol and Aunty, then sat back near a wall and waited while Aunty caught up with Chanyeol, overhearing their conversation as an observer.

Aunty asked about Chanyeol’s studies and job overseas. From there, Kyungsoo learned that Chanyeol had received the sponsorship to go abroad and decided to return to be of service to the country.

As the conversation changed to talking about Kyungsoo’s late mother, Kyungsoo couldn’t help but butt in and add his thoughts.

 

“According to what you said, you couldn’t have been older than twenty when you moved abroad sixteen years ago. One is not allowed to buy an oiran’s services until they are of age and since you were only a student then, how did  you even managed to buy my mother’s service with  a student’s allowance?” Kyungsoo inquired, folding his arms across his chest and leaning back against the wall.

Aunty giggled at Kyungsoo’s question, hiding her mouth behind the sleeve of her kimono as she laughed, that being a polite habit ingrained in her since her oiran days.

Chanyeol too chuckled, “I think you’re mistaken. I was never a client of your mother’s. But you were right that I wasn’t of age then. I’m only thirty-four now so I’m not that old.”

Aunty then pointed out, “Chanyeol here used to work in the post office and he would deliver parcels to us here in Yoshiwara. One day, he accidentally ran into a sumo wrestler here who threatened to beat him up in front of the house. It was your mother who saw this and went out to save him. That’s how they met.”

Chanyeol smiled, adding, “Yeah, it was a part-time job I had while in high school. I was only seventeen at that time and everyone in Yoshiwara respected your mother. Not even a huge sumo wrestler was daring enough to cross her. Your mother and I were good friends after that. Before I left, she said to come back here when I was of age so she could show me a ‘good time’.

“I’m sure she would have loved to see you again. You did grow up into a fine young man.” Aunty fondly smiled, remembering her deceased friend. “You are of age now aren’t you? I’m sure Kyungsoo can arrange something for you with one of our girls. Consider it as a welcome back gift from an old friend.”

Kyungsoo bowed his head slightly, “I do apologize that I am unable to grant my late mother’s wish to you as she is deceased but I can introduce you to the oiran here and if you are interested in any of them, I can help arrange you to spend a night with one of them.”

Chanyeol flustered, clutching his boater hat in his hands, “Oh no, that won’t be necessary actually. I just came here to visit. I do not seek such services.”

“Is that so? Are you perhaps interested in the oiran from different houses? I am friends with the other Mothers, so I can send you their way if that is what you wish.” Kyungsoo further offered.

“Actually, I can’t do that either. I do not wish to be rude and I know you are one of the best houses in Yoshiwara. I’m sure anyone would be honored to be in my position. I do not mind having dinner and being entertained by the oiran here but I won’t be able to you know-sleep with them like I’m expected to.” Chanyeol was rather unsettled and slightly squirming around on the tatami mat he sat on.

 

Kyungsoo and Aunty both turned to look at each other and then at Chanyeol.

“I must apologize. We didn’t mean to be rude but we’re just not used to being turned down when we offer our house’s services, especially as complimentary like this, which we have never done before. In fact, we even have to turn some of our clients away even if they offer a high sum of money. I must say I am actually baffled but we respect your decision.” Kyungsoo bowed his head again, apologizing.

“No, that’s alright. Please don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault,” Chanyeol bowed his head too and waved his hand away, trying to stop Kyungsoo from bowing back again. “You see…” Chanyeol continued, scrunching the material of his boater hat in his hands, “I’m gay so yeah.”

Aunty nudged Kyungsoo sitting beside her with her elbow.

Kyungsoo winced away, knowing what Aunty was trying to imply. Kyungsoo wasn’t actually surprised at Chanyeol’s revelation but he certainly did not see it coming either. It wasn’t an easy topic to be talked about in the time they lived in after all, especially outside the boundaries of Yoshiwara.

 

“I see,” Kyungsoo nodded, unsure of what else to say.

“Kyungsoo here isn’t an oiran but he can show you a ‘good time’ too.” Aunty playfully noted, patting Kyungsoo on the shoulder. “He does like men too.”

 “Oh” Chanyeol’s mouth hung open, rather surprised himself too.

“Aunt, you know I cannot do that. Mother made me train but I’ve never done this before. I’ve never slept with anyone before,” Kyungsoo hissed lowly but it was loud enough for Chanyeol to overhear them.

“It’s not every day you can come across a man who likes men like you too. Furthermore, Chanyeol is a nice, polite and studious fellow.” Aunty persistently tried to convince Kyungsoo. “Take some time off and have fun with Chanyeol.”

 

Chanyeol wasn’t sure if he should acknowledge Kyungsoo or just pretend he never overheard that. But Chanyeol knew that he was receiving the second-hand embarrassment as it was.

Chanyeol came up with an idea while Kyungsoo and Aunty were going back and forth about the whole thing.

Chanyeol cleared his throat before coming up with his suggestion, “I wouldn’t want to pressure you into anything you are uncomfortable with but as it stands, I would hate to refuse your hospitality any further. If it’s possible, will you allow me to take you out for tea or lunch at a teahouse as my date? None of this oiran stuff, just the both of us as two individuals.”

Aunty pinched Kyungsoo on the thigh causing him to flinch back slightly as she muttered under her breath, “Go for it, Kyungsoo.”

Kyungsoo gave in, forcing a smile, “Yes, I would love to. Is the day after tomorrow fine with you?”

Kyungsoo wasn’t opposed to the idea of going out with Chanyeol. He did find Chanyeol attractive and quite joyful to be with, in the one meeting they had so far.

But Kyungsoo was twenty-three years old; he ran a professional business that sold entertainment, sex, and companionship for a night and he had no idea how to do any of that in practice outside of theory, even if Chanyeol made it clear that they were just going out for a date as two individuals.

Least to say, Kyungsoo was nervous.

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

 

It didn't take even half a day for all the women in the house to hear that Kyungsoo had landed himself a date.

After much persuasion and motivation, the women of the Hanakai oiran house finally managed to make Kyungsoo leave for his date one day.

Kyungsoo had literally clutched onto a pillar as they tried to push him out of the door where Chanyeol was already waiting for their lunch date.

“No! I cannot go. I still have to pick up some supplies from the grocers today,” Kyungsoo tried to back out, strongly holding onto the pillar. He was lying. The ordered supplies wouldn’t even be ready until next week.

“You will go or I will not go to my client either tonight,” Murasaki insisted, prying Kyungsoo’s fingers away from the pillar with her long nails. Murasaki’s threat held close to Kyungsoo because, at the moment, she is the highest earning oiran in all of Yoshiwara who had even paid off all her training debt. She was literally worth her weight in gold to the house.

“Come on, you should go,” Chiyoko, one of the youngest oiran in training pulled on Kyungsoo’s sash as she too tried to get him to leave.

“No no. I just remembered that Chiyoko needs more training with the shamisen today.” Kyungsoo glanced behind to see the fourteen-year-old girl trying to hug him away from the pillar.

“I can teach her or Aunty can do it. Everything will be fine so just go! You worry too much. We won’t starve if you are gone for a few hours,” Murasaki sighed, finally managing to pry Kyungsoo’s hand away from the wooden pillar.

“But I have no idea what to do?” Kyungsoo panicked as Murasaki and Chiyoko pushed him to the door while the other girls onlooking them giggled at the scene.

“I think you put it in the ass but that’s all I know about men who like other men. Good luck, you’re on your own now.” Murasaki announced, grinning as she pushed Kyungsoo towards Chanyeol.

 

“Don’t burn the house while I’m gone,” Kyungsoo yelled back as Murasaki slid the sliding doors shut.

“Hi there,” Chanyeol took off his hat and bowed slightly to Kyungsoo. Chanyeol was wearing a black suit and tie today. In his other hand was a folded black umbrella.

“You really do like your western clothing don’t you,” Kyungsoo commented, “You dress like all the politicians and rich men who come here.”

“I was living in Europe for the past sixteen years so I just got accustomed to the dressing practices too. When I returned back here, I was pleased to hear that the Emperor has implemented western practices in society and even the fashion has spread here. Yoshiwara is ever the same, however, except for you.” Chanyeol stated, warmly smiling.

“How is that so?”, Kyungsoo arched his eyebrow as he posed the question.

“I must admit that I’m fascinated by the idea of a male oiran owner. My apologies for being rude the other night but the fact did come rather surprising to me.” Chanyeol politely apologized.

“I get that a lot too. It’s fine. Shall we leave now?” Kyungsoo assured.

“Right, yes we shall. The sky does look grey today so I brought an umbrella along just in case.” Chanyeol pointed out before putting his hat back on and promptly holding onto Kyungsoo’s arm.

Kyungsoo looked back at Chanyeol and at the hand on his arm, “I’m not an oiran so you don’t have to do that.”

“I’m sorry. I have never brought anyone out on a date so I got a bit nervous. I hope you can bear with me,” Chanyeol expressed.

“That’s fine,” Kyungsoo brushed it off, finding slight comfort in the fact that Chanyeol was just as inexperienced as he was.

 

 

 

The location of their date that afternoon was a fancy and expensive teahouse located outside Yoshiwara but not far from the famed red-light district.

Although it was Chanyeol who suggested the place, Kyungsoo knew the teahouse and its owner very well. Kyungsoo came there often but not as a guest. He would accompany his oirans to meet their customers there and sometimes make negotiations on behalf of his oiran.

The owner of the teahouse was surprised to see Kyungsoo there but with a man this time, who wasn’t a client and in the middle of the day to say the least.

 

Chanyeol had booked a private tearoom for them which overlooked a garden with a koi pond. A waitress had offered to prepare the tea for them but Chanyeol had declined, wanting to do it himself.

However, Chanyeol was rather clumsy and accidentally touched the ceramic teapot on top of the sunken hearth on the floor.

“It’s not ready yet,” Kyungsoo noted, taking out a handkerchief and wrapping Chanyeol’s hand with it.

Chanyeol chuckled, letting Kyungsoo wrap up his hand, “I actually have no idea how to do this.”

“That’s fine. It’s understandable. You have been living abroad for almost half your life now after all. It must feel a bit strange to come back and reacquaint with the culture here.” Kyungsoo reassured.

 

Sitting in the polite seiza position with his legs folded beneath his thighs, Kyungsoo proceeded to pour the green tea powder into a bowl before lifting the pot off the hearth and pouring the hot water into the bowl.

Chanyeol, on the other hand, sat cross-legged as he intently watched Kyungsoo stir the powder and hot water in the bowl with a bamboo whisk.

“You’re really good at this, aren’t you?” Chanyeol snickered.

“I was trained in the oiran art by my mother, but of course, I turned twenty years old and became the ‘Mother’ of the house instead of becoming a fully fledged oiran,” Kyungsoo chuckled to himself, recalling the memory.

“Well, thanks to that then,” Chanyeol gladly mentioned.

“Why is that so?”, Kyungsoo asked, looking up from the bowl to meet Chanyeol’s eyes.

“Because I wouldn’t be able to afford your company if you were an oiran,” Chanyeol happily answered.

Kyungsoo smiled too, finding Chanyeol rather amusing, “I am of the understanding that after all those years living and working abroad, you would have a lot of money now to afford an oiran even for a night.”

“I did study Law abroad and that pays well but I much preferred writing and I came back here to work as a writer for the press. It's less stable and I only get paid if there’s news for me to write about,” Chanyeol informed.

“It’s important to do what you love. I think you chose wisely,” Kyungsoo returned to whisking away the tea in the bowl.

“How about you? Do you love what you do?” Chanyeol inquired, hearing the first sounds of raindrops falling onto the roof and looking out at the garden from the tearoom.

Kyungsoo paused, head bowed down to the bowl in front of him as his hands stopped for a moment before coming up with a reply, “I do. It is important for me to continue my mother’s legacy although sometimes I did wish I was born female instead. Men have no place in this world. I consider myself lucky that I wasn’t thrown away from birth like all the boys who were born to oirans.”

“But here you are today. You should be proud of yourself. I’m sure your mother would too, knowing the woman she was,” Chanyeol was glad to say.

“Thank you. You are very kind,” Kyungsoo smiled a little, feeling a slight boost of confidence at Chanyeol’s words.

 

 

After tea, the rain continued to pour down from the sky, making splashing sounds on the stone path in the garden and rippling the water on the surface of the koi pond that reflected the grey clouds above.

Chanyeol opened up his umbrella and requested that Kyungsoo accompany him for a walk in the garden.

Kyungsoo was hesitant initially but Chanyeol managed to convince him otherwise.

 

Chanyeol held the umbrella up above their heads as they slowly walked down the stone path in the garden. The sounds of the raindrops falling over the umbrella were rather soothing to the ear and Kyungsoo did not regret complying with Chanyeol now.

The pair stopped on the bridge above the pond where Kyungsoo poured out some crumbs from the tearoom to feed the koi fish.

Kyungsoo clutched the wooden box used to hold the crumbs in his hand as he looked ahead, drifting into thought.

“Thank you for taking me out today,” Kyungsoo mentioned.

“You’re welcome anytime. In fact, I would like to thank you for agreeing to spend the afternoon with me,” Chanyeol was pleased indeed.

“I hope that I was a satisfactory company today. I know you were looking for my mother and I cannot be her replacement but I hope I didn’t disappoint you,” Kyungsoo bowed, yet again.

“Please, you don’t have to be so formal with me. I was your mother’s friend and I would like to be your friend too now. She was a great woman but I’d like to get to know you as just you,” Chanyeol established.

“That would be nice. I too would be honored in becoming friends with such a nice person like you.” Kyungsoo had to fight back the urge to not bow again to Chanyeol after the elder man’s request to be informal around him. It was just something he was so accustomed to.

 

Chanyeol couldn’t help but chuckle hearing Kyungsoo praise him. He was slightly embarrassed and as nervous about the whole thing as Kyungsoo was, “You really butter me up, Kyungsoo.”

“Excuse me?”, Kyungsoo didn’t quite catch the reference.

“Nevermind that. I guess this is the part where I kiss you now if we were in Europe,” Chanyeol sheepishly announced.

“Why is that so”, Kyungsoo blankly questioned.

“You see, in Europe, public displays of affection are rather lax than they are here.” Chanyeol faked a cough, trying to hide his embarrassment.

Kyungsoo laughed instead, “I can’t tell if you are serious but that is funny of you to say.”

Chanyeol too laughed and noticed that he liked the creases that formed around Kyungsoo’s eyes when he laughed.

 

 

 

When Kyungsoo got back to the house later that day, almost everyone was by the door waiting for him and pressing him on to tell about what had happened during his date with Chanyeol.

Kyungsoo smiled, remembering the date and he never felt more than eager to see a person who wasn’t a client-again.

 

 

 

Life went back as normal for Kyungsoo. He was bustling around from place to place be it day or night to make sure the oiran house ran as smoothly as it was supposed to.

Kyungsoo failed to find a client for Hatsuyuki by her twentieth birthday and had to delay her debut ceremony as an oiran.

Until then, Kyungsoo was busy going around Yoshiwara talking to his contacts to find a client who would be willing to sponsor the ceremony.

Kyungsoo could not afford to wait longer because even though the Hanakai house was as prestigious as it was, oiran houses were synonym with debts and none were free from it in Yoshiwara.

Things were already hard as it was.

 

Kyungsoo failed yet another meeting with a potential client even after personally making a visit to their residence and entertaining them over dinner with his singing accompanied by Kyungsoo playing the shamisen.

Dejected and feeling a bit lost, Kyungsoo walked with his head hung low and his shamisen wrapped in cloth under his armpit.

Kyungsoo couldn’t help but feel that if he were a woman, it probably would be easier for him in such a world. Kyungsoo was fine and comfortable with being male but the thought of being ‘inadequate’ did overwhelm him sometimes.

 

Kyungsoo passed by a stall selling oden [hot pot] by the riverbank on his way back to Yoshiwara. Kyungsoo may have been coming back from a dinner with his clients but he had not eaten anything, being busy entertaining and trying to convince the client to fund a debut deflowering ceremony for Hatsuyuki.

The smell of the boiling broth in the pot did make his stomach growl. Kyungsoo sighed and gave in to his hunger, taking a seat at the stall and ordering his meal.

He wouldn’t have time to eat when he got back because he had to make sure all his oiran who went out that night had come back safely with or without their clients.

 

Kyungsoo placed his shamisen down on the ground and drank the glass of sake that was poured out for him by the stall owner while his oden bowl was being prepared.

Kyungsoo drifted off into thought, hiccupping from finishing the glass of sake too fast. Kyungsoo was worried and riddled by the amount of debt the house had to bear if a client wasn’t found soon enough.

 

“I’ll have what he’s having.”

Kyungsoo heard the deep and familiar voice- ordering. Kyungsoo was sure that the voice belonged to Chanyeol’s and he sure indeed, Kyungsoo saw Chanyeol taking the stool beside him.

“Good evening,” Chanyeol gleefully greeted, turning to smile at Kyungsoo. “I was passing by and I saw you here so I thought I’d join you if that’s alright.”

“Of course. It’s not a problem at all,” Kyungsoo assured, sitting up a bit straighter.

“How have you been lately? I’ve been meaning to visit you in Yoshiwara again soon actually now that my workload is lesser.” Chanyeol revealed, circling the rim of his glass with a finger. “Also, I still have your handkerchief from the other day and I wanted to give it back to you but I don’t have it with me right now.”

“I’m good. I have been busy too as of late and you can always return the handkerchief later on,” Kyungsoo informed, thanking the stall owner when his oden bowl was served.

“I see,” Chanyeol nodded, then noticing Kyungsoo’s shamisen on the ground near his stool. “You had a busy night tonight too, did you?”

Kyungsoo sighed, holding the chopsticks in his right hand, “I have. Hatsuyuki’s debut ceremony is a few weeks late now and I still haven’t found the right sponsor for her. The house has a large scheduled debt installment to be paid off soon and we were going to use the money from Hatsuyuki’s debut to pay it off.”

“That does sound tough,” Chanyeol sympathized with Kyungsoo.

“It is”, Kyungsoo placed the chopsticks down and chose to drink more sake instead of eating. “I have eight people to feed including myself. Then I have to pay for other things such as the girls’ clothes, makeup, accessories, and their grooming classes. It’s not cheap and we have to pay the teahouses and restaurants too to let us do our business to entertain the clients.”

 

Kyungsoo pressed a palm to his face, bemoaning his current situation, “I know Murasaki has some money but I hate to take it all away to pay off the installment since she’s already giving away a part of her earnings to us even after her training debt is cleared.”

Chanyeol patted Kyungsoo on the back, “I’m sure you can get through this. You are Hanakai’s son after all. She was a strong and ambitious person. You take a lot after her.”

“I get that a lot too but at best, I will only ever be half the person my mother was” Kyungsoo dryly chuckled, resting his hands on the table, feeling a bit tipsy.

“If there’s anything I can do for you, please let me know.” Chanyeol offered, picking up his own chopsticks and beginning to eat.

Kyungsoo giggled, feeling boisterous from the alcohol intake, ignoring his own steaming hot bowl of oden, “The second oldest trainee at the oiran, Satsuki, is only seventeen years old. It’s three more years before she can make her debut but I do admit she’s more likable than Hatsuyuki. I have to debut Hatsuyuki in the nearest time no matter what. I cannot afford the heavy interest penalty on the debt installment.”

“That is unfortunate. Perhaps, I could ask around my friends or my father’s friends and see if anyone is interested in it? My father is a politician so I think he might know a few people,” Chanyeol suggested, lifting his bowl up so he could sip the soup.

Kyungsoo burped, then pushed his bowl towards Chanyeol, “Here, I changed my mind. You can have my oden but sure, if you know anyone interested, please let me know.”

“I’ll see what I can do and thank you for the oden,” Chanyeol grinned at Kyungsoo who laughed back at him.

Kyungsoo slumped his head down on Chanyeol’s shoulder, beginning to feel drowsy, “You know, I’m rather desensitized to it by now but I do sometimes feel bad for the girls because they have no say in it and their virginity is sold off like a piece of an item for sale in a store. If I was a woman or if anyone would even buy a man’s virginity, I’d rather sell off mine so they wouldn’t have to.”

“You are interesting aren’t you,” Chanyeol noted, shaking his head when Kyungsoo passed out snoring onto his lap.

 

 

Chanyeol later helped a semi-passed out Kyungsoo walk back to the oiran house to drop him off. Murasaki and the older oiran had returned for the night and helped Kyungsoo up back to his room.

Kyungsoo woke up the next morning pretty late than what he was used to with a pounding headache, dry mouth, and an annoying hangover.

He couldn’t let that hold him back, however. The day had to go on as usual. A day he spent not doing anything was a day wasted, Kyungsoo believed.

 

 

Lucky for Kyungsoo, the older girls had taken over his duty and sent off the younger ones to their classes that morning. They were pretty reliable as it stands. It was Kyungsoo who worried too much about them.

That gave enough time for Kyungsoo to run down to the store to pick up the supplies. Kyungsoo bought the supplies with a credit system and he knew he was screwed when the grace period would be ending soon and he didn’t have the money to pay it all off.

 

 

In the afternoon, Kyungsoo delivered Auntie’s lunch up to her room in the third-floor room as usual.

“I’m sorry I am a bit late today,” Kyungsoo apologized, setting down Auntie’s food tray before getting up again to open the windows and let fresh air in.

“You don’t have to apologize, Kyungsoo,” Aunty assured before continuing, “Murasaki told me that you were home pretty late last night and Chanyeol had to drop you off here. You should have told Chanyeol to stay the night.”

Kyungsoo froze, standing near the window when he heard Auntie’s statement, “Aunty, it’s not like that between us.”

“Not yet at least,” Aunty cheekily remarked.

 

Kyungsoo ignored Auntie’s antics and teasing as he helped to pour out her tea out of the pot. This was routine for Kyungsoo and as much as he had come to like Chanyeol, he had to admit that Chanyeol was rather ‘out of routine’ for him.

Aunty sighed, heaving her shoulders as she stared at her blurry reflection on the tea in the cup, “You are free unlike us, Kyungsoo. You shouldn’t restrict yourself and sometimes it’s okay to listen to your heart when it comes to matters of the heart.”

“That is sound advice, Aunty. I will remember that but you need to not worry about me.” Kyungsoo politely nodded.

“We all love you here, Kyungsoo. You’ve done a lot for us even though you didn’t need to,” Aunty declared.

“I haven’t done enough yet. I can still do more for everyone here,” Kyungsoo stated, reminding himself.

 

 

 

As the date neared for Kyungsoo to pay off the debt the house owed, Kyungsoo still failed at trying to find a sponsor client for Hatsuyuki’s now delayed debut ceremony.

Kyungsoo was rather in a pinch and he now actually regretted not asking where Chanyeol worked or lived at because he did feel like asking for the latter’s help now in looking for a sponsor.

Kyungsoo brushed off the thought and assumed Chanyeol just forgot about the whole thing. Kyungsoo did look forward to seeing Chanyeol again but accepted as it is if they weren’t meant to be.

The thought of actually being in a mutually exclusive relationship that didn’t involve money or promised favors did seem a bit farfetched for Kyungsoo. It wasn’t what he was used to seeing.

 

 

Kyungsoo spent the afternoon in a room on the first floor, mending the seam and stitches on the kimono belonging to Sorakiko, the second oldest and only other fully fledged oiran after Murasaki.

It was rare for even the largest oiran house to have more than three or four fully-fledged oiran at the same time as the older oiran would usually end up getting married to a client or leaving the house when their debt had been paid off.

Only the highest ranked oiran, the ‘tayu’, would remain behind at the house and inherit it from the Mother. The others would have to leave eventually when they retired and could no longer work.

It was harsh for a former oiran to find a living outside Yoshiwara once she retired when all the skills she had learned over the years suddenly become useless in everyday working society.

Kyungsoo was however adamant about honoring his late mother’s respects to take care of everyone in the house for as long as he could and managed to afford.  Kyungsoo himself would have been thrown out of the house as a child, if otherwise, for simply being born the gender he was.

 

Kyungsoo would usually send the kimono for mending at a specialized store that dealt with fabric restoration but as it stands, Kyungsoo wasn’t able to afford such services at the moment without racking up further debt.

Kyungsoo wasn’t a professional at kimono restoration but he wasn’t bad at needlework either and wanted to make sure her kimono was ready by the time she got up so she could wear it to meet her clients.

This would have to do for now and Kyungsoo just hoped nobody would be observant enough to notice that the work was not done by a professional.

 

As Kyungsoo carefully threaded through the kimono’s stitches, the youngest oiran in training, Chiyoko, came bursting through the sliding doors.

“What is it now, Chiyoko? If you’ve returned from class, go have your lunch and get ready for your music lessons.” Kyungsoo instructed, focusing his attention fully on the gold-colored kimono in front of him.

“Someone is here to see you,” Chiyoko informed.

“If it’s Yumine from that house again, then I do not wish to see her. Remember what I told you if she tries to come here again?” Kyungsoo reminded.

“It’s not Yumine this time. It’s your boyfriend, Chanyeol,” Chiyoko corrected.

Kyungsoo’s breath hitched in his throat and his hands paused, holding the needle attached to the thread. Kyungsoo cleared his throat, “He’s not my boyfriend yet.”

 

Kyungsoo got up, leaving behind his half-finished patchwork and promptly headed to the front door to meet Chanyeol.

Kyungsoo was excited and he never recalled ever feeling like that when it came to seeing someone. It was exhilarating in such a pleasant way.

 

Kyungsoo was grinning wide from ear to ear when he saw Chanyeol waiting on the bench in the doorway.

Chanyeol wasn’t wearing his suit today. He wore a black vest above his tie and dress shirt and his boater hat was clutched in his hands.

Chanyeol stood up and smiled too when he saw Kyungsoo approaching. Chanyeol bowed to Kyungsoo, greeting, “Good afternoon, Kyungsoo.”

“Good afternoon to you too,” Kyungsoo replied, equally as eager.

“I’m sorry to drop by unannounced. I do apologize if you were busy and if I am disrupting you since the girl who greeted me at the door earlier on informed me that you were busy with chores.” Chanyeol expressed.

“That was nothing urgent. I can find the time for you,” Kyungsoo asserted gently. If he were truly being honest, Sorakiko’s kimono was actually considered an urgent matter.

“I’m glad and honored to hear that especially knowing how busy you are,” Chanyeol beamed.

“If I could say the same, aren’t you supposed to be at work at this time of the day?” Kyungsoo questioned, afraid that he was imposing.

“I actually am supposed to be at work but I managed to sneak out a little bit. I don’t think anyone will notice,” Chanyeol threw his head back as he laughed before composing himself, “I do have something to tell you which is why I dropped by here.”

 

For a moment, Kyungsoo was slightly disappointed that Chanyeol wasn’t there for him but Kyungsoo quickly discarded the thought because he knew it was probably immature for him to expect such a thing.

That thought was too soon pushed aside when Chanyeol announced, “So, I’ve talked to some people and I think I may have found someone interested in sponsoring your oiran’s debut ceremony. He’s a son of my father’s friend. They run a fine dining restaurant chain so I believe they have they can afford it. I’ve made the arrangements for him to meet you to discuss this matter further.”

Kyungsoo almost jumped with joy and immediately leaped to hug Chanyeol around the neck, “Thank you so much, Chanyeol. I don’t know how I could ever repay you.”

Chanyeol chuckled, patting Kyungsoo on the back and slightly hunching over for Kyungsoo who held him around the neck, “Well, I did purposely forget the handkerchief you lent to me the other day.”

“Why is that so?” Kyungsoo inquired, not quite understanding Chanyeol’s motive, pulling away from the hug now that he realized what he was doing.

“I wanted to use it as an excuse to see you again,” Chanyeol smirked.

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

 

Kyungsoo was busy as usual that evening like he always was, but this time his attention was focused solely on one goal and aim; which was to make sure he could strike a deal for a sponsor for Hatsuyuki’s debut ceremony.

Not until an oiran had her virginity sold off to the highest bidder, known as a sponsor, she wasn’t allowed to make her professional debut and earn back her debt in the cutthroat world as an oiran.

Chanyeol had arranged the meeting with a man named Kensei Munehara, the son of his father’s friend who owned several fine dining and luxury restaurants in the major cities of Japan.

 

Kyungsoo was in Hatsuyuki’s room helping her get ready, combing and fixing the pins in her hair while Chiyoko was helping out with the outfit.

“Remember to be on your best tonight,” Kyungsoo reminded, firmly inserting a butterfly hairpin and making sure not even a strand of hair was left astray.

Hatsuyuki was silent, staring into the mirror before she protested, “I don’t think I should do this.”

“That is nonsense. Chanyeol is coming to pick us up very soon. The dinner to meet your potential sponsor is tonight and you can’t back out of it now.” Kyungsoo insisted.

“No. That’s not what I meant. I don’t think I want to do this anymore. I don’t want to live in this world anymore.” Hatsuyuki expressed.

“I don’t think any of us wants to if we had a choice but we don’t have anywhere to go. Yoshiwara is the only place for us.” Kyungsoo solemnly added.

“It’s not like that,” Hatsuyuki muttered lowly to herself.

Kyungsoo finished fixing Hatsuyuki’s hairdo and got up from his kneeling position, “I have to get ready myself. I’ll wait for you downstairs. It will be fine. You just have cold feet and this isn’t the official ceremony either. We’re just going to meet the clients.”

 

Dressed in his best formal black kimono and hakama [kimono trousers], Kyungsoo waited down by the front door when a horse-drawn carriage pulled up in the street in front.

Chanyeol emerged from the carriage, taking off his hat and waving it to Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo bowed back instead.

Chanyeol jogged up to Kyungsoo waiting under the noren [door fabric dividers], putting his hat back on, “I’m wearing the same suit I was wearing when I first met you. So now you have seen me wear the same clothes twice but I must say you look good tonight.”

Kyungsoo lightly chuckled, “Thank you for the compliment. That color does look good on you too.”

“You’re welcome, anytime. So, are you ready for tonight?,” Chanyeol asked, lowering his head when he walked further in and the noren curtains hit the top of his head. The fabric barely even touched the top of Kyungsoo’s head.

“Yes, we are just waiting for Hatsuyuki to be ready. She’ll be here soon,” Kyungsoo informed.

“Alright then,” Chanyeol mentioned as he took a seat on the bench near the doorway.

“I have to thank you again for tonight. I have run out of options and I just did not know what else to do if you haven’t helped arranged this meeting when you did.” Kyungsoo bowed his head as a sign of gratitude.

“It’s nothing,” Chanyeol grinned, “My dad knows a lot of people and it didn’t hurt to ask around.”

“I don’t know how I could ever repay you,” Kyungsoo mentioned, humbly.

“We’re good. Don’t worry about it,” Chanyeol assured.

 

Chanyeol later helped Hatsuyuki down the stairs and into the carriage as it was hard for her to walk in the full getup of several layers of kimono.

Kyungsoo followed behind, lifting up the tail end of her kimono so it would not get dirty. As they exited the door, Kyungsoo eyed the bowl of salt nearby which he would usually throw over their shoulders when they leave for the night. 

Kyungsoo decided against it, however. It was just mindless superstition.

 

 

 

The woman in question never made the negotiations and dealings themselves when it came to their virginity being sold off. It was the Mother of the oiran house that does it and in this case, it was Kyungsoo’s responsibility to do so.

The venue for the meeting that night was one of the private rooms in the fancy restaurants owned by the Munehara family.

Hatsuyuki was made to talk to and entertain the potential client, Kensei Munehara, by singing and playing the shamisen that Kyungsoo had brought along with her.

In the meantime, Kyungsoo had to talk to and convince Kensei’s father, a balding middle-aged man with a potbelly to pay for his son to sponsor Hatsuyuki’s debut ceremony.

 

Chanyeol, on the other hand, was sipping sake and eating by himself in the same room as them as he looked out the sliding glass windows and occasionally stole glances at Kyungsoo.

A few times, Kyungsoo did catch Chanyeol looking over at him and whenever their eyes met, Kyungsoo felt slightly shy and embarrassed as he tried to hide his grin. Chanyeol also smiled back.

 

 

Kensei had been depressed and devastated recently after being left by his wife of barely a year and his father, the friend of Chanyeol’s father, had been looking into finding a young oiran for him to meet and probably marry one day.

The Munehara family was rich, prestigious and good friends with lawmakers. Kyungsoo knew that if everything went well according to plan, Hatsuyuki would be set for life even when she retired as an oiran.

Kyungsoo was more than grateful to Chanyeol for this because if it weren’t for him, Kyungsoo wouldn’t have even gotten close to talking to people of such rank and securing such opportunities even if not for himself.

 

Everything was going well so far, Kyungsoo thought. Kensei looked happy and enamored with Hatsuyuki and Kensei’s father seemed interested and pleased too.

Things were going as planned until the door to their private room was quickly slid open and pushed open until it banged against the frame.

Everyone in the room and even Kyungsoo raised their heads to see who it was that had come in unannounced. A waiter would have politely knocked beforehand.

 

“Yumine?” Kyungsoo exclaimed, eyes round in horror.

“Hello there, Kyungsoo from the Hanakai,” The woman named Yumine snarled. “I see you’re here trying to scam the Munehara family with that harlot of yours,” Yumine pointed towards an equally surprised Hatsuyuki.

“I will not stand such baseless accusations! You are being rude and intrusive here,” Kyungsoo firmly stood his ground, standing up from his seat.

 

Chanyeol remained seated, equally alarmed but confused as he looked around the room at everyone else there.

“I have eye-witnesses all around Yoshiwara that Hatsuyuki has been seen together and leaving the house of a man who works as a security guard in Yoshiwara!” Yumine accused. “She is no longer a virgin and I cannot stand by while you try to sell her debut ceremony for money when you don’t deserve it.”

“What is she talking about? What is this?” Kensei’s father blurted, looking rather shocked.

“Then where are your witnesses? Why should I believe you over my girls? I know you have been trying to tarnish the Hanakai’s reputation ever since my mother was in charge of it” Kyungsoo defended, ignoring the Muneharas demands on him to explain the situation.

“How can you even call yourself the owner of an oiran house if you don’t even know what they are up to? Ask her yourself and see,” Yumine challenged.

Kyungsoo immediately turned around and headed to Hatsuyuki at the end of the room, demanding, “Is this true? Please tell me it isn’t”.

 

Hatsuyuki shook her head and began to sob. Kyungsoo wanted to believe otherwise but her actions and body language were contradicting the belief he wanted to hold on to.

Kyungsoo was shaky and his fingertips felt tingling from the anxiety and panic as he muttered, “Then its true isn’t it?”

Hatsuyuki nodded, tears spilling onto her face and staining the makeup on her face, “I’m so sorry. I love him and I didn’t want any other man to have it.”

 

The Muneharas; both father and son began shouting at Kyungsoo for deceiving and trying to con them. They soon began throwing threats at Kyungsoo for apparently trying to scam them.

Chanyeol got up, trying to break them off while Kyungsoo was still stunned and standing in a corner with a crying Hatsuyuki.

Chanyeol held onto Kyungsoo’s arm, “I think you two should go. I’ll get a carriage to take you home now.”

Kyungsoo shook off Chanyeol’s hand, “I have to deal with this myself. We can get back ourselves.”

“No, it’s my fault. I was the one who arranged this so let me talk to them. I believe you two should go home and talk about this between yourselves. I can take care of this.”

“Thank you,” Kyungsoo muttered, bowing his head and leading Hatsuyuki and himself out of the room.

 

Kyungsoo took one final look at Chanyeol, who was looking back at him before he left. Kyungsoo was sure he felt something tug in his heart when he did that but he chose to ignore it.

Kyungsoo knew better because these sorts of things only happened when feelings got in the way.

 

 

 

After much discussion with Aunty and the senior oirans, Murasaki and Sorakiko, it was agreed that Hatsuyuki would be expelled from the Hanakai and her debt to be divided, added and bore upon by the younger trainees.

Yumine herself had a strong reputation and repertoire throughout Yoshiwara. It was too risky to let Hatsuyuki continue being in Yoshiwara when Yumine knew the truth.

Even though Kyungsoo cared for all the women in the Hanakai, protecting the house’s reputation superseded everything else.

 

Hatsuyuki left on good terms, however. Kyungsoo made it clear that he was letting her go so she could be free to be with the man she loves.

Before she left, Kyungsoo gave her the last of his money so she could move to a small village and start over as a free woman.

When it rained, it did pour indeed. Summer soon came, bringing it with the strong rain and typhoon season of the year.

Kyungsoo managed to negotiate a grace period extension for another few months but when that too came to an end, he feared that he would not be able to prevent the house from foreclosure and everyone else with nowhere to go.

Kyungsoo felt rather lost and helpless unlike he never felt before, and he had no idea what to do about it.

 

 

The rain was exceptionally strong that afternoon. Kyungsoo stayed home, sitting on the bench near the door with the door slightly open.

Kyungsoo’s mind was drifting elsewhere but his eyes were watching the splatter of rain as it fell onto the gravel road outside.

As Kyungsoo was watching the puddle of rain on the ground, a pair of feet wearing dress shoes and grey trousers came into view.

Kyungsoo lifted his head and saw Chanyeol standing outside, wearing a matching grey suit standing under his black umbrella.

 

“Good afternoon, Kyungsoo,” Chanyeol greeted, forming a small smile.

“Chanyeol...” Kyungsoo could only say his name but he admitted that he was a bit excited to see Chanyeol there.

“May I come in?” Chanyeol asked for permission.

“Yeah sure,” Kyungsoo allowed him to.

 

Chanyeol stepped under the shade of the roof awning and closed his umbrella, standing it upright near the wall outside as he took off his shoes in the doorway, leaving only his socks on and walked up to Kyungsoo sitting on the bench.

“Sneaking out during lunch again?” Kyungsoo dryly chuckled.

“Kind of,” Chanyeol snickered.

“So what brings you here today?” Kyungsoo questioned, turning his head slightly to look at Chanyeol.

“I came to visit you. We didn’t get to talk much the last time I was here so I wanted to make up for that.” Chanyeol commented, “The house seems quiet today. Are you alone?”

“Yeah, everything was still in a mess after that whole thing so I couldn’t talk much to you” Kyungsoo explained, “I’m not alone. Aunty is upstairs in her room and some of them are asleep since they work late into the night. The younger girls are in class and they might have to stay back a while because of the rain.”

“I see,” Chanyeol nodded. “How have things been? Did you manage to sort everything out?”

Kyungsoo sighed, resting his hands on his knees, “Hatsuyuki left two days ago. We all miss her still so things have been quiet. She’s only three years younger than me and we grew up together here in the house after her family sold her to us.” Kyungsoo then solemnly smiled at the thought, “-but she’s with the man she loves and is free to make her own choice now.”

“What you did was brave. I’m sure your mother would have done the same if she were here today,” Chanyeol gently placed a hand over Kyungsoo’s on the latter’s knee.

Kyungsoo dryly chuckled, “If I were my mother, we probably wouldn’t have ended up in debt like this. I don’t know what else to do, Chanyeol. I can’t go out and earn money like the women. There is no place for a man in Yoshiwara.”

Chanyeol squeezed Kyungsoo’s hand in his, encouraging him, “I know you can do it, Kyungsoo.”

“No, I can’t. Not this time,” Kyungsoo pulled his hand away from Chanyeol to wipe his tears that began to fell. Kyungsoo sobbed, “Everyone is going to lose their home and it’s my fault. I am useless.”

“No, don’t say that. You aren’t,” Chanyeol returned to hold Kyungsoo’s hand. “I can help you.”

Kyungsoo refused, shaking his head, “You don’t have to do that. You don’t owe us anything, Chanyeol. I’ve already troubled you enough.”

 

Chanyeol knew that nothing he could say now would comfort Kyungsoo. Chanyeol wanted to help and do something about too but he felt as helpless and lost as Kyungsoo did.

Chanyeol pulled Kyungsoo into a hug and that was when the emotional dams holding Kyungsoo’s emotions began to spill.

Kyungsoo cried his heart out against Chanyeol’s chest and even the pounding rain outside became no match for his despair.

 

Kyungsoo did apologize later on when he noticed that his tears had caused a considerably wet stain on the front of Chanyeol’s grey suit.

Chanyeol was quick to brush it off and assure that it was no problem.

It was only later on in the day after the rain had stopped for a while and Chanyeol had left, Kyungsoo realized that Chanyeol had yet to return his handkerchief.

Kyungsoo smiled to himself at the thought because it probably meant he would get to see Chanyeol again.

 

 

Kyungsoo’s little moment of fluttering happiness didn’t last long after all.

While everyone slept, Kyungsoo stayed up, leaning against a pillar near the courtyard as he watched the moon orbiting the night sky and the stars slowly fade out from the night sky as daybreak approached.

Kyungsoo was too worried and restless to sleep, knowing that when he wakes up to another day it would be closer to the date where he had to pay off his debts and now even the source to repay the debt was out of the question.

 

Kyungsoo knew he had to do something about it and even before the sun had fully risen from above the horizon, he was done going through and rummaging through the belongings of his late mother.

Kyungsoo picked out her expensive kimonos, hairpieces, jewelry, and gifts from her previous clients which he planned to sell at a pawn shop for some money.

It would cover at least a portion of the debt and at least delay the unwanted foreclosure of the house until he could find enough money.

 

 

Kyungsoo felt bad to do such a thing to his mother’s prized possessions and even prayed for her forgiveness at the altar that morning but he knew he had to do this.

If things went well, he could even buy it back from the pawn shop when he had enough money.

Kyungsoo wrapped the items with brown paper, slipped it under his arm and walked out of the house before anyone even got up.

 

The streets of Yoshiwara were still empty and deserted, minus the few clients who were returning after their nightly visits and the occasional delivery men already about their businesses.

The large red arch at the end of the street which bordered Yoshiwara and the outside world was now in view as Kyungsoo continued trudging on the stony and dusty path between the rows of other establishments in the red-light district.

Kyungsoo lowered his head and tried acting the least conspicuous he could. He already felt guilty as it was.

 

When Kyungsoo finally lifted his head, he was actually surprised to see Chanyeol ahead of him with his usual suit and hat but with a briefcase in his hand.

“Chanyeol!? What are you doing here at this time of the morning?”, Kyungsoo felt cornered.

“I was going to see you actually. I have to go out of town today actually for work and I won’t be back for a week or two so I wanted to see you before I leave,” Chanyeol replied, then asking, “Where are you headed off to?”

“I’m just running some errands,” Kyungsoo hid the truth.

“I see since I already ran into you, do you need any help with that?” Chanyeol referred to the package under Kyungsoo’s arm.

“It’s alright. I don’t think that would be necessary,” Kyungsoo tried to shake the topic off. He couldn’t let Chanyeol know what he was actually doing but he didn’t want to lie either.

“I think you do need help,” Chanyeol decided by himself and tried to take the package from Kyungsoo with his free hand.

“No, I got this,” Kyungsoo refused, pulling away from Chanyeol.

 

Kyungsoo pulled back too hard on the package against Chanyeol trying to take it; causing the package to slip from under his arm and slip out of his grasp, falling onto the ground where the messy wrapping paper opened up and spilled all the contents out.

“I am so sorry,” Chanyeol profusely apologized, crouching on the ground where he set his briefcase aside to help Kyungsoo pick the items up.

Kyungsoo was first to throw himself to the ground and try to scoop everything back up.

Chanyeol then paused, holding up a familiar hairpin with flower ornaments, “I know this hairpin”.

 

Kyungsoo tried to grab it back from Chanyeol but the older man pulled his hand back and stood up on his feet.

“I know this hairpin because I was the one who gave it to your mother. I spent my entire monthly salary as a delivery boy to gift this to your mother as gratitude for helping me.” Chanyeol stated, twirling the pin in his hand and looking back at Kyungsoo. “All these stuff are your mother’s aren’t they?”

Kyungsoo snatched the hairpin from Chanyeol before slipping it into the robes of his kimono, “I’m sorry Chanyeol but I have to sell it off. If I don’t we’ll be homeless and jobless. None of us in Hanakai have families or friends to fall back on if the house gets closed down. I can’t let that happen.”

Chanyeol sighed, “I told you that I can help, Kyungsoo. My family has a lot of money and I can pay off your debts and my we’ll still have a lot left for ourselves.”

“You don’t understand, Chanyeol. You may owe my mother but you don’t owe me so I cannot just take your money like that. I am not her! I can never be her!” Kyungsoo lashed out. “You don’t know how useless and helpless I feel!”

Chanyeol took a deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment, “I may not know what it is like to be in your shoes but I understand how you feel about this. It’s easy to give but sometimes we need to learn to receive too especially when in need.”

 

“No, you really don’t understand. Sure, you are independent and you don’t rely on your rich family for money but if anything happens to you, you can always go back to them and they’ll back you up on your feet again. We at Yoshiwara have no such option.”

Kyungsoo ignored Chanyeol as he wrapped up the rest of the belongings of his late mother back into the wrapping paper.

“Kyungsoo, please wait,” Chanyeol pleaded, holding onto Kyungsoo’s hand.

Kyungsoo, however, shook off Chanyeol’s hand and did not forget to bow even while he was irritated, “Have a good day, Chanyeol and have a safe trip.”

 

Kyungsoo walked off, leaving Chanyeol standing there high-strung on the empty streets of Yoshiwara.

Chanyeol had one last option and he was hoping that he wouldn’t have to do it but it was the last card he could use now this late in the game.

Kyungsoo headed out of Yoshiwara for the pawn shop and Chanyeol walked further down Yoshiwara to the Hanakai house.

 

 

When Kyungsoo got back from the pawn shop later that morning with some money stuffed away in his robe, he immediately went to the kitchen to get Auntie’s meal ready.

Kyungsoo, however, ran into Sorakiko in the kitchen behind the hearth and exclaimed, “You are early this morning. You worked last night so you should go back to bed and get some rest. I can watch the fire.”

“I know that but Aunty has a guest right now and I’m making tea for her and the guest. Chiyoko woke me up to do this because you don’t let her around the fire,” Sorakiko explained, throwing a piece of coal into the fire.

“Is it one of her former clients?”, Kyungsoo asked, rolling up his sleeves before ordering, “Let me do this. You go back to bed.”

“No. It’s Chanyeol, your boyfriend,” Sorakiko answered, heading out the kitchen and yawning.

“I wish,” Kyungsoo sighed to himself as he boiled the water. “What is he still doing here anyway?”

 

 

Kyungsoo prepared the tea into two ceramic cups and laid it out onto a tray. Then, he carefully walked up the stairs to the third floor to Auntie’s room, carrying the tray in front of him.

Kyungsoo made sure to keep his footsteps light and be as quiet as possible because most of the house was still asleep.

When he reached outside of Auntie’s room, Kyungsoo kneeled down on the floor near the sliding doors and laid down the tray on the floor.

 

Before Kyungsoo was going to announce his arrival and ask for permission to enter, he was caught by surprise to overhear Chanyeol’s conversation with Aunty inside the room.

 

Kyungsoo’s mouth hung open and he felt himself trembling when he heard Chanyeol recite the sentence that made him that way.

“I am of the understanding that Kyungsoo was trained in the oiran arts even though he could never become one when he turned of age because of his gender. I am also aware of the debt that the Hanakai owes and I know this might sound unorthodox and I’m going to put it in the best words I can but I wish to sponsor’s Kyungsoo’s debut ceremony.”

Kyungsoo later heard Aunty following up with, “Oh dear”.

Oh dear Kyungsoo indeed.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm bad with estimations and this will be a five-shot instead.


	4. Chapter 4

 

Kyungsoo never believed that in all his twenty-three years of life, he would be sitting down and talking to Aunty and the senior oiran regarding his own debut ceremony and how to go about it.

Almost all the time but this one instance, he was on the other side of the line, being the one who helped prepare and arranged the ceremony instead of being the one who had to undergo it.

 

Kyungsoo always knew that the day would never come for him because he was born male even though he was born and raised in such a world, the world of Yoshiwara also being the one he ever knew.

Even his own debut ceremony would be a rather unconventional one because it was not like he could officially debut as an oiran and began working like the women in his house after the ceremony. He would just return to becoming the ‘Father’ of the house.

In fact; the owner of an oiran house which Kyungsoo was, was supposed to be a senior and former oiran who themselves had undergone the ceremony and made their dues in the profession.

Kyungsoo was just doing things the other way around and skipping the middle step.

 

 

As per tradition, Kyungsoo himself was not supposed to be arranging the details of his ceremony as the one who would undergo it.

The Mother of the house and the senior oiran were supposed to be in charge of the debut ceremony but in the Hanakai house, the rules were a bit different.

The Hanakai house did still try to keep in line with tradition as much as they could despite the stranger than normal circumstances.

 

It was Aunty who chose the date for the ceremony and the senior oirans, Murasaki and Sorakiko, who picked out Kyungsoo’s outfit and the decoration of the room for the ceremony.

Aunty had initially refused Chanyeol’s offer to sponsor the ceremony because she insisted that Kyungsoo wasn’t an oiran and was thus free to make his own choices, unlike the women in the house were.

It was Kyungsoo who had changed Auntie’s mind and made her accept Chanyeol’s offer on his behalf, as tradition disallowed Kyungsoo from accepting the offer himself even if he did own the house.

 

 

 

Chanyeol paid a sum of money upfront as a deposit before he left town for the week and the ceremony was then to be held two days after Chanyeol returned from his work trip.  The remainder of the money was to be then paid the morning after the ceremony.

In that one week for preparations, Kyungsoo felt rather odd to be sitting down and doing nothing as the women around the house were the one who were bustling around and preparing for the ceremony.

 

Murasaki held up a sample of cloth, holding it against the skin on Kyungsoo’s hand as she winced, “Gold doesn’t suit you. The peacock embroidery is nice though.”

“I’ll just wear my formal kimono and hakama that I have. I don’t think we should be spending this much on something I only have to wear once,” Kyungsoo suggested. “Furthermore, it’s going to cost us a lot to have it tailored in such a short notice.”

“That formal kimono you last wore for your mother’s funeral? Isn’t that bad taste, Kyungsoo? Besides, you only get to debut once and all of us wore new kimonos on the day so you should too,” Murasaki insisted.

“Yes it’s a ‘debut’ but that’s just the flowery term for it. It’s just basically a ceremony to lose your virginity and I’m probably going to have my clothes off half the time anyway. I can’t work as an oiran like you after this so I don’t need a new kimono,” Kyungsoo stressed, picking up the fabric samples scattered on the floor which he planned to return to the tailor.

“Well, Chanyeol did give us the down payment and we can afford to get you a new kimono. Don’t you want to look good for the night at least?” Murasaki tried to convince Kyungsoo.

“The money is supposed to go to paying off the debts,” Kyungsoo asserted.

 

Murasaki ignored Kyungsoo’s protests and picked up another fabric sample, this time a white cloth with golden chrysanthemum embroidery and held it up near the exposed skin on Kyungsoo’s neck.

“This looks good. We’ll go with this,” Murasaki decided.

“Murasaki, we have debts to pay off. We can’t afford this.” Kyungsoo repeated.

“I understand that but Kyungsoo, your virginity was bought with a higher price than any of us in the house. Even if we get this for you, we will still have enough money left especially when the full payment is made later. Don’t you think that Chanyeol deserves a proper ceremony considering how much he is paying? You may be male but we too have a reputation to uphold if you recall,” Murasaki reminded Kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, “Fine. Do as you please.”

Murasaki then patted Kyungsoo on the back, “Don’t worry. It’s normal to be nervous. We all were.”

Kyungsoo flushed, embarrassed and looked away.

It did feel odd to be on the other side of things indeed. Although Kyungsoo never planned to stay celibate his entire life, he had come to terms that he might probably have to consider his orientation and the world he lived in.

Of course, he never imagined it to end up like this either but he wasn’t complaining.

 

 

The venue of the ceremony was chosen at an expensive traditional inn attached to a fancy teahouse. Part of the deposit made by Chanyeol was made to pay for the services and the room for a night. The rest would be up to Kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo did not meet Chanyeol again until the ceremony. It was Aunty who met up with Chanyeol to confirm the date and venue before the event.

 

Kyungsoo himself was busy practicing the old skills he learned but never got to use in preparation for the night.

An oiran sold not only their body but also their talents and skills, continuing a tradition that had originated hundreds of years ago from the palace and court customs.

At times, Kyungsoo did feel the urge to hide away until the whole thing was over but he acknowledged that he was just having cold feet.

Furthermore, being the head of the house, it would hypocritical of him to chicken out of his debut ceremony.

 

 

 

The morning of the ceremony, Kyungsoo paid a visit to the local shrine and offered the ritual 5 yen coin, rang the bell and clapped his hands together to pray for the ceremony to go well.

While praying at the shrine, Kyungsoo did realize he was lucky enough to actually have a say in his debut ceremony when the other women did not.

And he actually got a sponsor whom he very much liked and wanted to be with too. That itself was a privilege that was only dreamt of by the women in Yoshiwara.

It gave Kyungsoo all the more reasons why he should go through this.

 

 

All other activities and nightly engagements for the women in the house were put to a halt for the week so they could focus their time and attention solely on Kyungsoo’s debut ceremony.

In the late afternoon, around the usual time Kyungsoo would be waking up Murasaki and Sorakiko to get ready for the night, Kyungsoo found himself being the one getting ready for the night.

 

Kyungsoo only got to see the kimono that had been sewed for him on the evening before the ceremony.

Innately, Kyungsoo cursed Murasaki for choosing a white kimono with a red collar and sash because it imitated a wedding kimono usually worn by women.

Aunty was happy to be able to get out of bed after being sick for so long to help Kyungsoo get into his elaborate kimono and hakama with three layers and over five pieces to it.

 

“Okay, hold in your breath,” Sorakiko ordered, placing a foot on Kyungsoo’s back as she pulled the strings to tighten the first sash around Kyungsoo’s waist.

“Be gentle-,” Kyungsoo yelped, feeling the fabric constrict around his waist as the second layer of the sash was wound around his waist. “Why did you people choose this kimono anyway?”

“You don’t have hair long enough for us to put up and you are not going to wear makeup either so we have to make sure your outfit outstands more,” Murasaki clarified, picking up the final layer of sash which was tied over the previous two layers and the knot fastened in front.

 

The knots to kimono sashes were always worn on the back. Only oiran were known to wear it in front and Kyungsoo never thought he’d ever had to do so either.

“I can barely move in this,” Kyungsoo almost stumbled over trying to slip into his sandals.

Aunty giggled from across the room, “Being an oiran isn’t about mobility.”

“Yeah, so the men can catch you easily I bet,” Kyungsoo snarled.

It was a dark joke indeed but the women in Yoshiwara knew the truth very well. It did make for a good laugh however when Aunty, Murasaki, and Sorakiko burst out laughing.

 

With help, Kyungsoo managed to walk down the stairs and headed to the front door where a horse-drawn carriage was waiting outside.

“Have fun,” Chiyoko waved to Kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo smiled a soft smile, “I will. Please behave while I’m away and remember to read up on your poetry and language.”

“We will,” Satsuki bowed to Kyungsoo, seeing him off by the door.

Aunty blew her nose into her handkerchief, sobbing lightly, “Please take care, Kyungsoo. I know Chanyeol is a nice man but I just want you to be alright.”

“I’ll be alright, Aunty. Remember to take your medicine and go to bed early tonight.” Kyungsoo reminded before turning to Sorakiko, “You’re in charge while I’m gone and until Murasaki gets back. Take care of yourself and everyone.”

“I will do my best. You have a good evening,” Sorakiko bowed to Kyungsoo.

“Well then, we better get going,” Murasaki picked up the bowl of salt and pinched up an amount before throwing it over Kyungsoo’s shoulders.

 

Kyungsoo lowered his head and shoulders as per the tradition when the salt was tossed over him. Kyungsoo wasn’t one to believe in superstitions but tonight, he was counting on that salt to actually work.

Murasaki filled in the role that was supposed to be Kyungsoo’s, to accompany the one undergoing the debut ceremony.

She helped Kyungsoo in and out of the carriage, holding his hand as he walked up the steps to the room on the second floor of the inn where Chanyeol was already waiting for them.

 

“Wait, what if I don’t do it right?” Kyungsoo flustered, just a few feet from the sliding doors separating the room and the hallway.

Even the inn employee had stopped, looking on at them when Kyungsoo hesitated.

“There is no right and wrong. It’s different for everyone,” Murasaki clarified, holding Kyungsoo’s hand.

“I wasn’t talking about that! I meant what do I do after the whole ceremonious thing? Do I just ask him if he wants to have sex?” Kyungsoo blurted out.

“Just do your thing and at least you know him before this so it makes things easier even if it’s your first time. I’d like to help you and tell you what to do but you’re two men so it’s going to be different.” Murasaki quickly pushed Kyungsoo into the room, sliding the door open.

 

 

Chanyeol was sitting down cross-legged on the mat when Kyungsoo arrived. He then stood up, greeting both Kyungsoo and Murasaki.

Kyungsoo and Murasaki both kneeled on the tatami mat covered floor, prostrating themselves to Chanyeol before rising to their feet.

“Please take care of him. He is in your care now,” Murasaki bowed her head to Chanyeol who too bowed back again.

 

The inn employee following them soon served them the dinner and sake before leaving together with Murasaki, leaving Kyungsoo alone with Chanyeol for the rest of the night.

It was a spacious room tea room with the large sliding windows left open, overlooking the view of the garden from the second floor and the lanterns lighting it below.

Kyungsoo could see the futon and sheets already laid out behind a divider in the room. It made him nervous to think about it so Kyungsoo avoided looking behind the divider for the rest of the evening.

 

Kyungsoo looked up at Chanyeol. He was wearing a black three-piece suit that night with a grey vest underneath and Kyungsoo could spot his usual boater hat lying nearby on the floor.

“I hope you had a good trip. How was it?” Kyungsoo asked, breaking the silence as he knelt on the floor near the trays to pour out the first saucer of sake.

“It was rainy. There was so much rain and there were a lot of potholes everywhere. The people at the branch office were so exhausted. I spent my entire time sleeping in my hotel room while I wasn’t working,” Chanyeol complained, sitting cross-legged on the laid out cushions in front of the food trays.

“I haven’t managed to thank you for tonight so I wish to express my humble gratitude for your sponsorship and willingness to accept me as your partner for tonight,” Kyungsoo bowed again from his seated position after serving the sake to Chanyeol.

“Thank you too actually. I told you I would help in any way I could,” Chanyeol added, grinning wide and feeling happy to be of help.

“I still feel like I don’t deserve your kindness,” Kyungsoo averted his gaze from Chanyeol’s as he moved out to pour the second saucer of sake.

“Of course you do. I really like you and it’s my pleasure to be here tonight with you,” Chanyeol assured, still smiling wide. “-although I have no idea at all on how to be a sponsor for things like this. Aunty told me what to do and that’s it.”

Kyungsoo chuckled, “If you think you’re lost at what to do then so am I. I only know these things in theory but when it comes to practice, I severely lack at it.”

“That makes it both of us then,” Chanyeol laughed.

Kyungsoo smiled, feeling lighter than he initially was, “I hope I do well then.”

“I have to say that you do look good tonight though,” Chanyeol praised with a glimmer in his eyes.

“You do too,” Kyungsoo replied, honest to his true feelings.

“Well, this is my best suit and I wore it solely for this purpose,” Chanyeol revealed.  “I wanted to look my best so I could impress you too.”

Kyungsoo couldn’t help but smile, hiding his face behind the sleeve of his white kimono. Chanyeol saw this and he couldn’t help but laugh either at how corny he was being either.

 

 

 

Then, it was followed by dinner that had been served out for them. Chanyeol ate his meal heartily while Kyungsoo struggled to even finish half of his bowl of rice even though he hadn’t eaten much that day.

The anxiousness and overall restless feeling that Kyungsoo felt prevented him from feeling at ease even around someone like Chanyeol who he always felt comfortable to be with.

Kyungsoo did thank Chanyeol from the bottom of his heart for making light banter and small jokes to give him something to actually talk about and react to.

Kyungsoo was more worried about disappointing Chanyeol than anything else. Kyungsoo felt like he owed Chanyeol so much for the night and he didn’t want Chanyeol to feel like it was for nothing.

Anymore and Kyungsoo would have to owe his life to Chanyeol for helping him when he did.

 

 

After dinner was cleared up with Chanyeol ending up eating Kyungsoo’s leftover, then came the sake ritual.

The inn employee had also closed the windows after clearing up the dishes, leaving Chanyeol and Kyungsoo secluded in the room without further interruption for the rest of the night.

 

Chanyeol drank from the first saucer from the sake; leaving half of the alcohol left for Kyungsoo to drink before moving on to the second saucer and repeating the same actions until the ritual was completed and the sake in the saucers were finished by them both.

 

 “I guess that seals the deal then,” Chanyeol announced, “I am now your patron and this is your debut.”

“A debut for someone who will never get to step into such a world,” Kyungsoo muttered.

“You do your best in whatever you can even if you aren’t able to. It’s an honorable thing that you are doing, Kyungsoo,” Chanyeol mentioned, sliding his hand over the gap between the both of them to hold Kyungsoo’s hand in his. Chanyeol placed his palms above and below Kyungsoo’s hand, holding it gently and comfortingly.

Kyungsoo smiled weakly, lowering his head, “This is the least I could do for everyone.”

“And I’m grateful that you accepted my help too. I’m sorry that this was the only way I could go around to helping you because I know that if I give you the money, you’ll refuse it and return it to me anyway,” Chanyeol smiled at the thought.

“So you cornered me into this ceremony reserved for women just so you could give me the money and I would not be able to refuse?,” Kyungsoo looked up back at Chanyeol as he posed the question.

“I guess you could say so,” Chanyeol snickered, “Aunty did turn down my offer for this though but when you said yes, she listened to you so if it weren’t for you I wouldn’t be here today either. Thank you for letting me help you too.”

“I hope I do my best then,” Kyungsoo declared, freeing his hand from Chanyeol’s so he could hold onto Chanyeol’s hand with both of his.

“You already are doing your best,” Chanyeol stated, looking on and smiling fondly.

“I don’t want you to feel like this is going to waste which is why I want to do my best. This is just a debut ceremony in name because I won’t be able to work as an oiran after this. I don’t want to feel like I wasted all your money for nothing.” Kyungsoo confided.

“It won’t be for nothing, Kyungsoo. That fact is true but I get to help you and that’s enough for me. In fact, I actually think that it would be good that you won’t be able to become an oiran even after all this,” Chanyeol disclosed, caressing Kyungsoo’s cheek with the back of his free hand.

“Why not?,” Kyungsoo questioned, staring straight into Chanyeol’s dark brown eyes.

“I don’t think I quite like the thought of you being with other men that aren’t me,” Chanyeol admitted, “I think I have come to be very fond of you, Kyungsoo. I was actually attracted by the fact that I would be able to become your first if I proposed to be your sponsor. I did it to help you first but that fact that didn’t escape me either.”

 

Kyungsoo was silent as he listened to Chanyeol, not even breaking the eye contact between them for even a split second. Kyungsoo was on a wild ride with no destination in mind as he listened to what Chanyeol had to say.

“But this isn’t about possession and I do not want to be like all the other men who choose to undergo these kinds of things so I’m afraid to say that I cannot do this with you tonight,” Chanyeol divulged in the truth.

“Wait…” Kyungsoo paused, removing Chanyeol’s hand from his face, “I don’t think I understand?”

Chanyeol sighed and then chuckled lightly as he brushed a hand through his thick black hair, “I’m saying that I can’t take your virginity tonight like I am expected to.”

Kyungsoo gasped, mouth hanging open as he clutched onto the fabric of his kimono around his knees, “D-did I do something wrong to make you not want to?.”

“You haven’t done anything wrong. In fact, you really impressed me tonight but I can’t do this, Kyungsoo. This is a choice I want you to make for yourself.” Chanyeol replied, feeling rather tense.

“But you paid for all this and you don’t want to?”, Kyungsoo shook his head, unable to understand Chanyeol’s point of view.

“I want to but what I want isn’t your body. I want you to be able to choose and that is all I ask for you,” Chanyeol leaned over, placing a hand on Kyungsoo’s nape before pressing a chaste kiss on Kyungsoo’s forehead.

Kyungsoo closed his eyes, dreading, “But how am I supposed to tell Aunty tomorrow morning that the ceremony failed? I bet she’ll make you take back the money because Aunty will feel bad for you, and if people find out and I mean people will because that hag Yumine has spies everywhere, it’ll tarnish the house’s name.”

Chanyeol hummed in thought before coming up with an idea, “We don’t have to tell anyone that we didn’t consummate the ceremony. They’ll just assume we did anyway.”

“So we are going to lie?”, Kyungsoo was left rather dumbfounded.

“Looks like it,” Chanyeol dryly chuckled.

 

 

Kyungsoo slept on the futon that night while Chanyeol slept further down the room on the tatami mat-covered floor with the extra pillow. Kyungsoo had offered to share the futon but Chanyeol insisted that he was fine sleeping on the floor.

The closest thing they ever got to being physical that was when Chanyeol struggled to help Kyungsoo take off the outer layers of his kimono and over ten meters length sash, so Kyungsoo could actually sleep.

 

Early the following morning, Chanyeol dropped Kyungsoo off back at the oiran house and paid the remaining dues to Aunty in person.

Before Chanyeol left that morning after meeting and making the payment to Aunty, Kyungsoo made sure to see him off alone at the door.

“Have a good day, Chanyeol,” Kyungsoo bade Chanyeol goodbye, bowing politely.

Chanyeol’s lips formed a thin smile as he fixed the hat on his head, “I do apologize for last night. I’m sorry for letting you down like that. I didn't mean to surprise you like that but I felt like it was the only way I could ever help you.”

“No, I am sorry for being so distraught like I was last night. I was rather surprised but I too respect your decisions,” Kyungsoo reassured, also apologizing on his own behalf.

“I’ve been holding onto this for the entire night,” Chanyeol revealed, pulling out Kyungsoo’s handkerchief from the inner pocket of his suit. “I wanted to give it back to you because I’ve been holding on to it for quite a while now.

 

Chanyeol handed Kyungsoo back the handkerchief, which Kyungsoo took into his hands.

“I’m sorry for scribbling on your handkerchief but I’ve written my work address and contact on it. I work weekdays from eight in the morning to four in the evening. If you have anything to say or just want to see me, please come by whenever it’s convenient for you and look for me. I will always have time for you and I would like to meet you outside Yoshiwara because I want you to know that this time it’s your choice.”

Chanyeol tipped his hat to Kyungsoo, smiling, before bidding his own goodbye and leaving.

 

Even after Chanyeol had left, Kyungsoo held the handkerchief in his hands, looking down at the address which Chanyeol had written down on it.

It was a strange feeling unlike any which Kyungsoo had ever felt before. He was technically still within the walls of Yoshiwara but yet he felt free.

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

 

Just like any other event or setback Kyungsoo faced be it for the better or worse, life always fell back into place and sorted itself out.

Once his own debut ceremony was over, Kyungsoo was back to being the Father of the Hanakai house where he was almost always on his feet bustling around to and fro performing various tasks tirelessly.

Kyungsoo’s day began before everyone else and his day ended after everyone else’s too. Kyungsoo lived to serve the Hanakai house and its residents and he was proud of that.

Nothing was out of place and every day seemed like the day before but Kyungsoo found peace and comfort in the routine.

But Chanyeol had been on his mind the entire time since that night, even if they had yet to meet since then.

 

 

It was noon, about a week and a half since the night of Kyungsoo’s debut ceremony. Since then, Kyungsoo had also been hiding the truth from Aunty and the rest of the house that technically, the main event never happened that night and he was indeed still very much a virgin.

Oiran were taught to lie to impress their clients but they were strictly prohibited to lie to the people of the house they came from.

Kyungsoo had to this time, however. He wasn’t an oiran and that didn’t apply to him, Kyungsoo justified.

There was a part of him that felt shameful but this lie was what kept a roof over their heads, clothes on their back and food on their plates.

 

The younger trainee oirans were off at classes while the senior oirans were still asleep and would not wake up for another few more hours, early that afternoon.

Kyungsoo had prepared a lunch dish of grilled fish and rice to bring up to Aunty.

As usual, he would arrange the plates and bowls onto a tray before bringing it to Auntie’s room on the third floor to serve her meal.

Then, he would lay out the dishes and platter and pour out warm water from the pot on top of the hearth to make tea.

 

“Has Chanyeol came to visit as of late?”, Aunty questioned.

Kyungsoo was pouring out the tea from the pot into the ceramic cup when he answered, “No, not recently.”

“My my, that is surprising to me indeed. He seemed really enamored with you and I just assumed he would be coming by more often now,” Aunty mentioned.

“I think he’s just busy with work,” Kyungsoo smiled, trying to hide his nervousness and the lie he was holding on to.

“That must be it,” Aunty went along with the assumption. “He has always been a hardworking boy after all. His father had a lot of money but he always wanted to work and earn on his own. I think you two would be great together.”

“That would ideal too,” Kyungsoo nodded, agreeing with Aunty on that one statement that he would make a great couple with Chanyeol.

 

He knew the reason why Chanyeol had not gone to visit after all. It was not because Chanyeol did not want to. It was because Chanyeol wanted Kyungsoo to make that choice for himself.

But it wasn’t that Kyungsoo did want to see Chanyeol either. He did want to but he was hesitant and unsure of the freedom of choice he was given.

In fact, the idea of free will and the right to choose was a new and rather abstract concept for someone like Kyungsoo who was born and raised in the walls of Yoshiwara where such things were only desired in daydreams because reality would only serve to crush it.

 

There was no way Kyungsoo did not want to see Chanyeol, not especially when all the tall men he ran into on the street while running errands all suddenly seemed to look like Chanyeol.

As his mother once said, “When you want to see someone, everyone will start to look like them.”

 

 

Auntie’s words rang through his head for the entire day and even the day after that. Kyungsoo couldn’t help but be sold to the thought that he would indeed be great with Chanyeol and that he indeed had that chance and more importantly, that choice.

Kyungsoo did not want to be stuck and regretting what could have been and he knew that he had to take action.

 

Kyungsoo arranged for his schedule to be as free as possible the next afternoon so he could go visit Chanyeol.

The younger oiran in training would not be at class the next day and Kyungsoo counted on them to take care of Aunty, watch the house and wake up the senior oiran while he was out for the afternoon.

The night before, Kyungsoo smiled to himself as he read the address and contact info Chanyeol had written onto the handkerchief with blank ink.

Kyungsoo knew that he had to try at least because this was the choice he chose to make.

 

 

Kyungsoo left the house at high noon. It was a cool and cloudy day despite it being in the middle of summer, with the sun fully blocked by the clouds.

Kyungsoo chose to forego bringing his umbrella along with him, assuming that because it had rained the night before, it would not rain again that afternoon.

Kyungsoo read again the address on the handkerchief to make sure he got it right before slipping it into his robes and making his way out of the house, down the streets and past the arch that divided the Yoshiwara enclave district from the capital city of Tokyo.

 

 

Kyungsoo had to ask around for directions as the address that Chanyeol had given was in a part of the city he wasn’t familiar with.

Kyungsoo did not come out to Tokyo often and if he did, it was only in the districts around Yoshiwara and that was to conduct businesses with the merchants there to obtain supplies for the house.

The district Chanyeol worked in was known to house government buildings, corporation offices and other important places of businesses. That itself was a whole different world than the one Kyungsoo lived in.

 

Kyungsoo made his way to a grey-brick building with a large billboard sign on the front which advertised the company in the building; that being the office and headquarters for a press and printing company which Kyungsoo recognized as one of Tokyo’s local and well-known newspaper and publishing company.

The name matched the one on the handkerchief Chanyeol had scribbled on.

There were carriages after carriages that pulled up in front of the building’s main entrance where people were picked up and dropped off, all of them dressed in Western attire and hats much like Chanyeol did too.

Outside of Yoshiwara, the country seemed to be progressing and adopting Western culture by the day, which only set to further widen the gap between Yoshiwara and the outside world, not that Kyungsoo was sure whether it was a good thing or otherwise.

 

It was a busy sight and the people that seemed to be coming and leaving all looked very busy, hasty and in a rush too.

Kyungsoo could relate to the bustling and on the go lifestyle, these people led, even if he belonged to a completely different world.

 

Kyungsoo entered the front doors of the building into the foyer with marble covered floors, where he saw more busy people with a lot of papers in their hands scurrying to and fro from the desks to other desks and rooms within the building.

Everyone was busy to even notice Kyungsoo and simply walked past him while they minded their own business.

Kyungsoo walked up to a desk which read “Reception” and like he was told to do, Kyungsoo told the young man behind the desk that he was looking for Chanyeol.

 

Kyungsoo waited by the reception desk while the receptionist went up the stairs to the upper floors of the building to look for Chanyeol.

Kyungsoo kept his eyes on the staircase and soon enough, the tall man with the rather pointy ears he badly wanted to see was seen skipping down the steps and waving to Kyungsoo as he kept up his speedy pace.

The receptionist from earlier on was panting behind Chanyeol, trying to keep up with him and loudly yelling at Chanyeol to not run while indoors. Chanyeol, of course, ignored all that.

 

“Kyungsoo!,” Chanyeol excitedly called out, practically skipping his last few steps so he could stand face to face with Kyungsoo.

“Uh…hi,” Kyungsoo greeted, a bit reserved.

“I’m very happy that you came to see me. I’ve been waiting for you to visit all week and you just saved me from a boring meeting this afternoon actually,” Chanyeol eagerly mentioned.

“Oh?” Kyungsoo was confused.

“I really don’t want to attend the meeting this afternoon so we’ll go out for lunch instead so we can talk a bit more in private,” Chanyeol grinned, signing his name in the employee log book on the reception desk before grabbing Kyungsoo’s hand.

“Where are we going?”, Kyungsoo asked, looking at his hand currently held in Chanyeol’s own.

“I know a restaurant we can go to just a few streets down from here. It’s also close to where I live,” Chanyeol informed.

“Is that alright? Are you allowed to leave the meeting?”, Kyungsoo inquired, a bit confused.

“It’s easier to ask for forgiveness than permission. Trust me, Kyungsoo,” Chanyeol remarked.

 

Sure indeed that statement did fit Chanyeol. If Kyungsoo knew that Chanyeol had always planned to not consummate the ceremony, Kyungsoo probably would have said no because he wouldn’t want to feel indebted towards Chanyeol for not being able to provide his side of the bargain.

But Chanyeol was like that and Kyungsoo realized that now.

Either way, Kyungsoo was fine with it too.

 

 

The restaurant which Chanyeol chose was indeed just a few streets down from the office building. It was a traditional restaurant with a large garden and pond overlooking the private rooms which Chanyeol had chosen to have lunch with Kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo decided to just drink tea as he had cooked food for himself back at home, which he planned to eat later on because it would otherwise go to waste.

Kyungsoo brought and maintained his mannerisms from Yoshiwara even outside of it, the behavior ingrained into him since a young age. Kyungsoo was always polite, poised and very formal.

Chanyeol, on the other hand, ate heartily and talked loudly between his chews even with his mouth full of rice.

One would consider that impolite but Kyungsoo thought it was rather amusing and actually adorable of Chanyeol.

 

Chanyeol was not like any of the people within Yoshiwara and Kyungsoo figured that that was the reason why he probably found himself harboring towards the said man so much.

To Kyungsoo, Chanyeol was like the first whiff of fresh air after opening the windows to a stale room that had been kept locked up for so long.

 

“Your workplace seems very busy. Work must be hectic for you, isn’t it?”, Kyungsoo guessed.

Chanyeol leaned his elbows on the surface of the table, propping his chin on his palms, “For those who work in the newspaper department, it is. I was tossed to the book publishing editorial department even when I applied to work in the newspaper department so it’s more slow-paced and relaxing for me there. That’s why I can afford to sneak out of work to see you.”

“I hope you’re not getting in trouble because of me,” Kyungsoo warned.

“I’d go through all the trouble for you,” Chanyeol felt slightly embarrassed having said that now but it was nothing but the truth.

Chanyeol was uncontrollably smiling now and Kyungsoo soon caught on to the infectious smile where he tried as much as he could to hide his face behind the sleeves of his robe.

 

”So, how have things in the house been? How is everyone?”, Chanyeol inquired, crossing his feet beneath the table.

“Everything has been well and going as usual. They’re all doing well too. I am grateful for your assistance because I would not know what would have become of us if you hadn’t helped when you did,” Kyungsoo once again expressed his gratitude.

“It’s my pleasure really,” Chanyeol replied, beaming at Kyungsoo. “Thank you for coming to see me today too. I was beginning to think that you didn’t want to see me anymore after that night but I understand if that was the case too.”

“Of course not. I did want to see you after that but I was a bit shy and reserved about coming here. I’m just not used to these kinds of things,” Kyungsoo clarified.

“I’m sorry if you felt pressured by that but I appreciate that you are honest with me,” Chanyeol apologized, sliding a hand across the table to hold Kyungsoo’s hand into his.

Kyungsoo shook his head, “Not at all. I wanted to do this and I just got that push I needed. I am happy to be with you right here at this moment.”

“So am I, Kyungsoo.” Chanyeol reciprocated. “I wish we could always be like this.”

Kyungsoo nodded, “That would be ideal indeed.”

 

 

As much as they would have liked to stay longer to talk about the direction of their relationship and where it was headed, Chanyeol did have to go back to work that afternoon.

Both of them had as many questions they would like to ask the other but that would have to come later, and they were sure that there would be a ‘later’ for them after all.

There would be many more times for them to be together and both of them were determined to make sure that fact would happen.

 

  
As they were about to leave the restaurant that afternoon, the skies began to pour pounding rain from thick gray clouds.

“I was hoping it wouldn’t rain today but it always seems to rain when you don’t have an umbrella around,” Kyungsoo sighed, standing under the awning outside the restaurant and at the rainy street outside from the shade he stood under.

“I didn’t even expect it to rain either. I thought the monsoon season was over,” Chanyeol interjected, “I’ll see if I can borrow an umbrella from the restaurant. Wait here.”

“Sure”, Kyungsoo wrapped his arms around his waist over his robe for warmth as he felt a chilly breeze blow through. It was a mild summer that year and the rain only made the temperature cooler.

 

 

While waiting for Chanyeol under the shade of the awning outside the restaurant’s doors, Kyungsoo heard footsteps approaching from behind and turned around, expecting to see Chanyeol.

Instead, Kyungsoo found himself standing face to face with Yumine, the Mother of the oiran house that was also the Hanakai’s long-standing rival since even the days when Kyungsoo’s mother was in charge.

“What do we have here?”, Yumine snarled, holding her closed umbrella in one hand like a cane.

“That is none of your business, Yumine,” Kyungsoo turned away, refusing to continue looking at the said woman.

“I thought you would be on the streets right now, penniless and starving but here you are in an expensive restaurant wasting away all that money the women in the house worked to earn. Should you really be doing that?”, Yumine accused.

“You do not have the rights to interfere with my personal life and even if it’s about the house, you have no rights to meddle your nose there either. Take care of your own house first,” Kyungsoo warned, sternly.

“Oh, I sure will but I just hate to see men like you leeching from the women. You are a man and you are useless in Yoshiwara if you are not a patron. You don’t even work as we do. You don’t deserve all of this and all of the glory of the Hanakai just because you were born through that whore’s legs. I bet she wished all the time she had given birth to a girl,” Yumine verbally attacked Kyungsoo.

“Don’t you dare speak that way about my mother! You have no idea what I’ve been through or what I go through. Who are you to say such things about me!?”, Kyungsoo raised his voice, defending himself. “What is your problem with me!?”

Yumine scoffed, “I bet even the clothes you wear now were bought from the money you didn’t even work to earn!”

 

Yumine lurched forward to pull on Kyungsoo’s collar in an attempt to rip his clothing out of the spite and jealousy she felt towards him, just because the Hanakai was well known and reputable than her own house.

The rivalry was no joke in such a world and Kyungsoo had experienced his fair share of it; be it from stealing each other’s clients, sabotaging the careers of other oirans by smirching on their reputations with slander to the usual catfight.

 

Kyungsoo resisted and was pushed out from the shade and into the pouring rain aside which quickly drenched him from head to toe.

Kyungsoo just thought that it was rather inconvenient that nobody was seeing this to help him but then. Kyungsoo did not fight back, simply slapping Yumine’s hand away from him and resisting when she tried pulling on his clothes.

Kyungsoo was just buying enough time until Chanyeol came. Chanyeol sure seemed to be taking his good time at the moment, Kyungsoo felt.

 

Yumine shoved Kyungsoo on the wet and slippery stone path leading out the restaurant, causing him to lose his footing. Kyungsoo felt himself slip and lose his balance; and in the split moment, Kyungsoo could foresee himself getting injured badly from the fall.

Right at that moment, Chanyeol ran out into the rain and managed to catch Kyungsoo just in time.

“Are you alright?”, Chanyeol worriedly asked, making sure Kyungsoo was able to stand well on his feet.

Kyungsoo nodded, trembling from being soaked by the rain, “I-I’m fine.”

“I know you. You are the man that was around when Kyungsoo was trying to scam the Munehara father and son. I see you are an accomplice,” Yumine spitefully accused.

“I remember you too and I think you should leave,” Chanyeol sternly ordered, putting an arm between him and Yumine to stop her from getting to Kyungsoo.

 

Chanyeol wrapped an arm around Kyungsoo’s waist protectively, leading him out of the restaurant’s compound and leaving a vengeful and screaming Yumine behind who demanded them to remain there so she could “deal” with them.

 “Sorry about that. I couldn’t find an umbrella but my apartment is nearby so we’ll stop there first. Are you okay?”, Chanyeol took off his suit, lifting it above his and Kyungsoo’s head to use for a makeshift rain shelter.

“I’m alright. It’s not anything I’m not used to,” Kyungsoo slightly trembled, hugging his own arms. “Don’t you have to go back to work?”

“That can wait. Now, we need to get you dry so we’ll drop by at my place first for that,” Chanyeol offered.

“Sure then,” Kyungsoo nodded lightly.

 

 

Chanyeol’s apartment building was just a few blocks away, not very far from the restaurant or the office where he worked at. All the locations were in a close walking vicinity with each other.

The guard working down in the lobby of the apartment was nodding off and asleep when they arrived, dripping wet from the rain.

 

Chanyeol’s unit was on the second floor and Kyungsoo watched as Chanyeol slipped his hand under the mat where he hid the keys to unlock his door.

Kyungsoo chuckled, “Is it safe for you to do that?”

“Burglary is the least of my worries,” Chanyeol grinned, unlocking the door and pushing the handle down to open the door.

 

Kyungsoo stepped in first into the spacious studio apartment with pale yellow walls, a futon laid out on the floor near the bay windows and rows of bookshelves on almost every wall that wasn’t occupied.

There were even stacks of books on the couch and on the floors that seemingly didn’t fit into the already full bookshelves.

“Do you read all these?”, Kyungsoo questioned, eyeing all the stacks of books lying everywhere.

“Yes, I do. I’m sorry if it’s messy. I haven’t brought anyone over since I moved back to Tokyo so my place isn’t very guest-friendly,” Chanyeol apologized, lifting the books off the dining table and throwing it onto the armchair.

“That’s why you don’t worry about burglars. Nobody wants to steal books I suppose,” Kyungsoo laughed.

“That is right. Furthermore, some of the books are in English and German. Not everyone can understand the language here,” Chanyeol seconded.

 

Chanyeol retrieved a towel from his drawers and handed it to Kyungsoo, “Here, dry up. The washroom is over there.” Chanyeol pointed to a door in a corner of the apartment. “I’ll let you borrow some of my clothes until yours dries up.”

“Thank you,” Kyungsoo took the towel into his hands, bowing his head and headed to the washroom as pointed to by Chanyeol.

 

 

Chanyeol found his yukata [light cotton kimono] which he used to use to sleep and hung it on the hook on the washroom door, telling Kyungsoo from behind the door to use it.

Kyungsoo loudly thanked him back from the washroom.

 

 

While Kyungsoo was changing, Chanyeol himself got out of the wet clothes and tossed it to the side. He would just deal with it later on laundry day, he thought.

Chanyeol took Kyungsoo’s wet blue kimono and hakama, hanging and clipping it onto the line in front of his window for it to air out and dry. He figured it would take quite a while because of the rainy weather.

Chanyeol changed into a plain white dress shirt and black trousers as he dried off his hair with another towel.

 

Chanyeol was then distracted by the book on the top of one of the stacks on the floor. Chanyeol soon found himself sitting cross-legged on his futon, reading and flipping through the pages.

Chanyeol was too absorbed with the book that he completely forgot that Kyungsoo was there inside his apartment with him.

It was a bit of a jump for Chanyeol when he heard the washroom door creaking open and seeing Kyungsoo standing there.

 

“I’m sorry to surprise you,” Kyungsoo apologized.

“Not at all,” Chanyeol eased.

Kyungsoo put the towel aside on the back of a wooden chair before approaching Chanyeol near the futon and taking a seat beside him on the white sheets.

“What book is that?” Kyungsoo questioned, pulling his legs up to his chest.

“It’s  _Kokoro_ by Soseki Natsume. The press I worked at actually published this about fourteen years ago. It started as a newspaper serialization but was eventually compiled into a novel. I hope I can actually publish my own work one day too,” Chanyeol stated.

“You’ll have to let me read your works then,” Kyungsoo giggled. “I was taught to read at the house but I never got to have a book to read.”

“I will let you be the first to read it then if I ever get to write something,” Chanyeol ruffled a hand through Kyungsoo’s damp hair before handing Kyungsoo the book in his hand, “Here, you can have this. I think you’ll like it.”

“Really?” Kyungsoo looked up back at Chanyeol with doe eyes, holding the book in his hands.

“Of course. Just look through and choose any book you want. You can have it.” Chanyeol confirmed, smiling.

“Since you’re letting me choose, then there is something here that I want,” Kyungsoo revealed, resting the gifted book on his lap before fluttering his eyes back to Chanyeol seated in front of him on the futon.

“Sure, what is it?” Chanyeol’s eyes too darted to look into Kyungsoo’s own similar dark brown eyes.

“Can I choose to have you?” Kyungsoo posed the question he never thought he’d get to ask.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to end it here at the 5th chapter but I ended up writing too much and I didn't want to post a long chapter so the next one will be the last chapter instead. Writing too much >>> chapter count estimations.


	6. Chapter 6

 

Chanyeol was surprised for a moment but his expression quickly turned into a smile, “I was talking about books but sure of course, you can have me too because I do want you as much too.”

Without any more haste, Chanyeol leaned in close to press a chaste kiss on Kyungsoo’s lips.

Kyungsoo was quiet and still, unsure what to say and do. Sure, the senior oiran in the house did talk about this and how to please men, but Kyungsoo always lacked the practical part.

Chanyeol pulled away, snickering, his face just a few inches away from Kyungsoo’s as they were seated on the soft down cover of the futon.

“I hope you know what you’re choosing to put yourself into by making this choice,” Chanyeol cheekily mentioned.

“This is my first time but I’m not that naïve, Chanyeol,” Kyungsoo replied, pressing a finger against Chanyeol’s lips before removing the finger to replace it with his own pair of lips.

“I’ll trust you on that then,” Chanyeol breathily stated, peppering kisses against Kyungsoo’s jawline.

 

Kyungsoo pushed the book on his lap to the floor and tilted his head to the side, allowing Chanyeol access to his neck that was being ravaged by the taller man.

“Can I?”, Chanyeol requested for permission, kissing the sensitive skin on Kyungsoo’s nape as he gently rested a hand on Kyungsoo’s head to give the younger man some support for his neck.

“Yes,” Kyungsoo consented, craning his neck backward, putting a hand down behind his back to support his weight up.

“Thank you,” Chanyeol expressed, lying Kyungsoo down on the futon below him.

 

Kyungsoo complied and laid down on the sheets with Chanyeol hovering above him and running a hand through his hair, “My yukata looks big on you.”

“You are way larger than me after all,” Kyungsoo chuckled, feeling the comfort of the down of the futon beneath him.

“We’ll have to take that off now, however,” Chanyeol added, moving his hands to the sash around Kyungsoo’s waist as he skillfully undid the knot.

 

Kyungsoo lifted his hips slightly to allow Chanyeol to pull out the sash tied around his waist before tossing it away, where the sash ended up landing somewhere in the stacks of books.

Outside, the rain was pouring and pounding against the glass windowpanes just above the futon on the floor. It was not loud enough to mask the sounds of Kyungsoo’s heart beating loudly.

He always knew he would be nervous when this time came, even if it had happened during his debut ceremony or here at Chanyeol’s place.

It was rather chilly in Chanyeol’s apartment and Kyungsoo felt that even more when his yukata was undone and his front was fully exposed, bare and naked in all its glory.

Chanyeol helped him slip the yukata off his shoulders down to his elbows but it did not fully come off because Chanyeol was distracted and ended up kissing down Kyungsoo’s collarbones instead.

 

“You’re beautiful, Kyungsoo. Like a precious flower,” Chanyeol complimented, resting his head against Kyungsoo’s chest from above.

“You are too,” Kyungsoo returned the compliment, resting a hand on Chanyeol’s shoulder.

“Thank you for choosing me. I am very happy that you did,” Chanyeol lifted himself up, propping his torso with his hands, on either side of Kyungsoo’s head.

Kyungsoo smiled, pulling Chanyeol down for another kiss which was sloppier, wetter and involved more tongues than the one before.

 

Kyungsoo helped Chanyeol undress; unbuttoning his dress shirt and pulling his trousers down where it too landed somewhere near the books too.

Kyungsoo had climbed onto Chanyeol’s lap, straddling and passionately kissing the older man.

Chanyeol had his hands planted firmly on either cheek of Kyungsoo’s bottom, kneading the soft flesh in his hands and spreading the butt cheeks apart.

Kyungsoo gasped in the kiss, pulling away and burying his face in Chanyeol’s shoulder.

 

“It’s ok, I’ll be gentle, I promise,” Chanyeol assured, lifting Kyungsoo off his lap and lying him back down on the futon.

Kyungsoo nodded, “You’ve done this before have you?”

“Y-yeah,” Chanyeol revealed, “A few times while I was in Europe but not for a few years now.”

“But you said you never brought anyone but me on a date?”, Kyungsoo arched an eyebrow, placing a hand on his bare stomach.

“I didn’t take those men I slept with on dates. It was just physical relations,” Chanyeol explained, “I have feelings for you so I feel a bit nervous right now.”

Kyungsoo giggled, “So, am I different?”

“Very different,” Chanyeol proclaimed, kissing Kyungsoo once more.

 

 

Chanyeol spread Kyungsoo’s thighs apart with his hands, firmly holding the thighs apart to still Kyungsoo down with all the trashing and hip bucking that the younger man was doing.

Chanyeol swooped down to kiss Kyungsoo when he removed one hand from the thigh to dip his saliva coated fingers into Kyungsoo’s ass.

Kyungsoo moaned into the kiss. It didn’t hurt like he thought he would. It was a new feeling and Chanyeol made sure to make him relax through the whole thing.

Chanyeol took his time and added another finger until he was three fingers deep inside Kyungsoo.

 

“Good?”

Kyungsoo nodded, “Yes.”

Chanyeol heeded the positive response and worked his long fingers within Kyungsoo, curling them and rubbing within the flesh until he found a spot which elicited the most pleasured responses from Kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo was clinging onto Chanyeol’s shoulders like it was his lifeline with heavy-lidded eyes and throaty moans that spilled from his mouth beyond his control.

 

It only got better when Chanyeol removed the hand on Kyungsoo’s thigh to palm Kyungsoo’s erection.

Kyungsoo’s thighs were trembling and his voice didn’t even sound like his own anymore. His brain was in a dizzy but pleasured haze unlike any he had experienced before.

It felt slightly sinful but so good at the same time. So good that Kyungsoo let all his walls down for this and he did not regret it one bit.

 

Kyungsoo had to cup over a hand on his mouth, biting onto his own fingers, being afraid of being too loud even when the rain outside was louder and drowned out his voice.

It was harder to be restrained especially when Chanyeol slowly eased into him, joining their bodies together and finally claiming Kyungsoo’s virginity a bit delayed than actually planned.

 

Kyungsoo moaned Chanyeol’s name and threw his head to the side with his eyes screwed shut, feeling the fullness within him and realizing how much he liked that feeling.

“It feels so good within you,” Chanyeol raspily panted between his gentle and light thrusts, resting his face in the crook of Kyungsoo’s neck.

Kyungsoo had balled up his hand into a fist as a response to the pleasure he was feeling, especially at the building heat and pressure pooling between his legs.

Kyungsoo found himself wondering why he even hesitated with this if he knew it would feel this good.

 

Kyungsoo slowly opened his eyes, when he felt Chanyeol lifting his head from the crook of his neck. Kyungsoo now also realized that from having his fists balled up, he was now grabbing onto the sheets covering the futon.

Chanyeol lustfully stared into Kyungsoo’s eyes when he hooked his arms below Kyungsoo’s waist, propping the younger man up onto his lap in a sitting position all while still buried within Kyungsoo.

 

Kyungsoo was a bit startled by the change in position but he played along until he was seated on Chanyeol’s lap with Chanyeol’s cock still buried within him.

Kyungsoo now wrapped his hands around Chanyeol’s shoulder for support as their heaving chests touched were brushing against each other.

“This is your debut and you are the star now,” Chanyeol announced, then pulling Kyungsoo into a kiss, rocking his hips upwards into Kyungsoo.

 

Taking the cue, Kyungsoo began riding Chanyeol’s member; grinding, rocking and lifting his hips upwards and downwards to find a rhythm with aided help from Chanyeol below him.

Chanyeol held onto Kyungsoo’s waist, holding him close and firmly, moving his hips and thrusting lightly to match Kyungsoo’s rhythm to find the utmost pleasure for them both.

Chanyeol had one hand on Kyungsoo’s waist and the other fisting Kyungsoo’s erection, helping him reach that chased and desired orgasm.

It was Kyungsoo’s show indeed and he was in the starring role and Chanyeol was the stagehands to make sure the play went on well.

 

 

When Kyungsoo came, his forehead was slumped against Chanyeol’s shoulder and he was clawing on Chanyeol’s back.

It did sting a bit but Chanyeol ignored all that. He couldn’t care less and he would just have to forego his usual weekend visits to the bathhouse until it healed up.

That or he could probably wear it around like a badge of honor, he thought.

Either way, it was not as important as this moment.

 

Chanyeol pushed down Kyungsoo gently back onto the futon. Kyungsoo was spent and exhausted, feeling the rush of drowsiness after the peak of his orgasm.

Taking back the control and the spotlight, Chanyeol thrust a few more times with his hips angled sharply to thrust deeper but slightly sloppy and out of rhythm.

Chanyeol breathed heavily, nuzzling his face against Kyungsoo’s neck again before pulling out and jerking himself off to completion, coming and spilling his seed into his own palm.

Chanyeol did not want Kyungsoo to deal with the mess later on and he felt that their relationship was not at that level yet.

They would get there eventually, the both of them genuinely believed but until then.

Kyungsoo shed a single tear at the end of it all which Chanyeol saw and noticed.

Chanyeol worriedly asked, wrapping a blanket around Kyungsoo just after he had wiped his hands with his own shirt, “Are you alright? Did I hurt you?”

“No,” Kyungsoo denied, shaking his head, “I just felt moved for some reason.”

Chanyeol chuckled, sitting up on the futon and facing Kyungsoo, “That does make me feel good about myself for some reason but then again, oiran are trained to talk their way around men to stroke their ego.”

Kyungsoo playfully and lightly hit Chanyeol on the shoulders, “I was being honest. I am not an oiran, remember?”

“Of course,” Chanyeol grinned, lifting his cheek up with the fond expression.

“-because if I was, that would have cost you,” Kyungsoo joked.

“Can I get credit for that?”, Chanyeol played along. “I don’t have much money at the moment and my father is going to give me a scolding if I spend anymore from my family’s funds. You’ll have to buy me out of debt in that case.”

Kyungsoo laughed, hiding his mouth behind his palm as per his usual habits.

 

Chanyeol shifted, moving to sit beside Kyungsoo and leaning their heads against each other.

Kyungsoo shared the blanket covering him with Chanyeol as they huddled under the warm fabric in the cold rainy weather.

“So, are we lovers now or something like that?”, Chanyeol questioned, locking his fingers with Kyungsoo’s. “I know people from Yoshiwara don’t get together into relationships out of love and only do it to free themselves but since you’re not an oiran, I hope that is alright with you.”

“-lovers? But don’t you have to be in love to be lovers?” Kyungsoo curiously inquired, enjoying the feel of the weight of Chanyeol’s hand in his.

“I think that’s covered on my half,” Chanyeol was happy to mention.

“You’ll have to teach me about that then,” Kyungsoo replied. “I want to learn about that now until the day comes when I’m ready to say that I do too.”

“You are good at coming up with excuses to see me aren’t you?”, Chanyeol snickered.

“I learned that from you,” Kyungsoo smiled, resting his head now on Chanyeol’s shoulder.

 

Although the journey ahead was still a long way to go with yet to be known challenges that would come their way, they knew that at least their hearts would be full because they had each other at the end of the day.

In an apartment littered with books and various tales within it, they found the beginning to their own story.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea what that was tbh. Thanks for reading yo. I appreciate it.
> 
> \--
> 
> Got any questions or just need to contact me? : curiouscat.me/hajinnie  
> Also on Twitter @hajinnie


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